Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers Still Moving (Saying ILY Pt 7)

mtb, been a while. How are you doing?

What's happening, DB'ers?...

Just hopping in for a quick update. Things are going great for me. Still GAL like it's my job. Cannot stress how important it is for getting throught the rough times. Gotta keep the mind occupied. Not much has changed in my sitch. Still moving ahead with the D. WW is still as nutty as a squirrel turd. She still has nearly no contact with the kids. Which is disappointing, but at the same time, may not be bad due to her drug abuse and other issues. She recently got another job as a secretary for some company. Lasted about a week before she got fired. She accused me of calling them and telling her boss that she was a recovering drug addict that has been fired from other jobs for stealing. Story doesn't really add up. She said he told her that he wasn't letting her go because of that call because that is just hearsay and he won't fire someone over a rumor, but he was letting her go because she is a single mom, going through a D, with a lot on her plate at the moment. I call BS. That would be an HR nightmare. Pretty sure she screwed it up herself and just needs someone to blame...

She also is moving into the goverment housing apartments this weekend because she can't afford the place she moved into. So of course, she's showed up here a couple times sniffing around and looking for things to take. I pretty much told her that there's nothing left here for her and there's no reason to stop by. That she's more than welcome to see the kids whenever she wants. Just send me a text setting plans and come get them, but the days of her randomly stopping by right before they go to bed and creeping around the house looking for things to take were over...

Kind of funny. She started popping up a bit more for a short period of time when she found out I had a female friend that I was spending time with. Accusing me of having her spending the night (I have not), having sex with her (I have not), and telling people she was my girlfriend (I have not). Also noticed her creeping by late at night in front of the house. I'd be on the front porch having a beer or glass of wine at midnight, and she would drive by and slow down as she went by the house. Weird...

As for me, got everyhting back into the school year routine. I'm busy teaching and the kids are back in school too. It can be hectic somedays, but that's just the way it is. We're doing the best we can with what we've got and doing a fine job of it. Need to get back into my workout routine though. With school starting and everything getting busier again, it kind of fell to the side. Going to a Labor Day concert on Monday which will be fun. Kids are spending the night at my parents' house thath night and running them to school the next day, so that will be nice. Not sure I'll know what to do not having to get the kids ready in the morning. Haha. Anyway, hope you all are doing well. I'd like to log on more and read some new threads and give back some advice, but I'm really busy right now. Hopefully I'll find the time soon...

Glad to hear from you mtb!

Glad to see the lighthouse shining bright!

Still doing good here, DBers. I'm still working my way through the D process. Got a counter petition from WW requesting 50/50 time with the kids, spousal support, and child support. That was 5 weeks ago. Funny part is, I have not received one phone call or text from her since then. It kind of blows my mind that she hasn't made any effort to contact the kids after requesting to have them half the time. Surely this will be helpful for me in court when discussing custody...

The kids are doing great. They are in a much better place mentally and emotionally than they have been in a long time. I'm doing great too. GAL like my life depends on it (In a way, it did). Concerts, football games, outings with the kids. It's great. I'm the happiest I've been in years. Hope all of you are doing well too...

Sounds like she is out there in lala land. Wants the kids half the time but NC for 5 weeks? Strange. Glad to hear you're doing well! Thanks for updating us.

No question she wants the kids 50/50 simply for the child support. Disgusting.

I'm so naive to these type of things, I never even thought of that, Steve. That's probably true. I'm guessing any lawyer or judge will see right through that too.

Without a doubt. It’s only about money for her. I pray to God that the court sees through this and does the right thing. These kids have been through enough and are doing the best they have since this whole thing started. Spending half their time with her would be a major setback for them. It’s sad that she is the way she is, but there is nothing I can do about it. Just focused on the happiness of me and my kids now...

mtb- just stopping by to encourage you to continue to do what is best for your kids. Stay positive - God bless!

Got a temporary custody order where WW can have the kids from Friday at 3 PM to Sunday at 6 PM every other weekend. All other parenting time goes to me. She agreed to it without a fight, but I'm not sure what to think about that. I hope this will just be the way it ends up, but I have a feeling she will go back to wanting 50/50 when we go to court. Tonight will be the first time she has had them overnight since this whole debacle started back in January. Funny thing is, it was supposed to start last weekend, but "something came up" (something better came up) and she couldn't have them. Anyway, I'm hoping the fact she agreed to this setup sets the precedent for the future...

I also got an email from her lawyer asking if she could have the kids on Halloween to go trick or treating because "Halloween really isn't his thing and I want to make sure the kids don't miss out on trick or treating". I told them I had already purchased the kids' costumes and planned on taking them. The way I see it, she just wants them for the photo op. "Look at me, social media! I'm taking my kids trick or treating! I'm such a good mom! Look at me!"...

The D is moving very slowly. My L said I would have to go to mediation before the court would make a decision, so we still have to do that. I'm just ready for this to all be over so I can continue moving on with my life. I'm the happiest I've been in years, and just want to get this over with and put it behind me...

Still GAL like it's no one's business. Going to Chicago next weekend to see my favorite band for 3 nights. Will be a nice little mini vacation. Kids are doing really well. They have adjusted well. Straight A's on the report cards and no more discipline issues at school...

I do fear that W coming back around may throw a wrench into things. Everything has been great with her not being around. She hasn't seen or talked to them in 7 and a half weeks. Tonight will be the first time. I guess I'm just afraid it's going to mess with them. I know she's going to feed them a bunch of BS, because she has in the past. Making excuses for why she hasn't been around and blaming it on me. Not sure if I mentioned it in previous posts, but several months ago, she told the kids that I wouldn't let her see them and showed them her phone with all the attempted phone calls that I did not answer. Partial truth. She is right, I do not answer her calls, because I have specifically told her if she need anything she needed to text me. That she could see the kids whenever she wanted to , but she needed to text me and be specific. She doesn't like that because it makes it difficult to gaslight when you have texts as proof of what was said. Instead, she would just blow up my phone with constant calls that I wouldn't answer until she would finally text and say she wanted to talk about the kids. I always responded to those texts. Anyway, the kids were upset with me saying that she said I wouldn't let them see her. I told them that was not the case. My daughter responded, "Yes it is. She showed us her phone. You won't answer the phone when she calls". Totally inappropriate in my opinion, A 3, 8, and 9 year old don't need to be brought into it so she can feel better about herself by making me look bad...

Anyway, things are going well and we'll see if she shows up this afternoon to get them. And we'll see how long she keeps coming to get them. Time will tell, I guess. Good luck out there DB'ers! Hope you're all doing well and making progress...