JOURNALING: So I guess that I haven't detached enough to where hearing about the ex possibly dating someone else doesn't bother me. Just received a call from the sister in law saying that one of her patients said that my ex is dating or seeing his son. Who also happens to be best friends with two of my good friends. It felt like a gut punch. 23 months post BD and 10 months post divorce signing and it hurts like it's fresh.
Me 49 W46 T25 M22 S22 D18 S13 W had EA Apr-Jul 2016 Dropped Bomb 7/9/16 ILYBINILWYA HER DIVORCE IS FINAL...8/18/17 Dropping the rope to SURVIVE & THRIVE!!!
Gordie 40s W 40s M20+ kids 2016 BD W fantasy affair w OM1 I do everything wrong 2017 I start to DB W says TLTL files for D PA w OM2 2018 I do LRT W drops filing and OM2 situation slowly improving
You are the prize. You have been the prize and you will always be the prize.
Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13 BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room" 8/15: H back to MBR 10/15: H back in dorm room 1/18: H files, now divorced
That is a gut punch. Cannot really prepare for it either. That news is always a surprise / shock. Hopefully once the suddenness of this wears off the pain will subside somewhat.
You are doing good man.
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
I appreciate the kind words and the support. It is just a shock. Not a surprise as that is what they do...they are searching for the elusive true love, happiness, and soul mate that they are sure is out there.
sjohn, as for treating myself last night...I was able to cook dinner for myself and my youngest. We then took our dinner and climbed onto the couch and watched a funny movie that neither of us had seen. At 11 his giggle and laugh is still so childlike at times and is healing and soothing.
I was able to end the night with a nice glass of wine and watch my oldest and a buddy hang out on my back patio with a guitar and cigar. I think I just found the title to my first attempt to write a country song. HAHA!
God is good and knows what He is doing in our lives even if we don't. Sometimes we simply need to step back and re-evaluate our circumstances. I guess because things had been getting better between she and I, my expectations had gone up. I need to recommit myself to just do me, take care of my kids, and keep my expectations to ZERO.
Me 49 W46 T25 M22 S22 D18 S13 W had EA Apr-Jul 2016 Dropped Bomb 7/9/16 ILYBINILWYA HER DIVORCE IS FINAL...8/18/17 Dropping the rope to SURVIVE & THRIVE!!!
Gordie 40s W 40s M20+ kids 2016 BD W fantasy affair w OM1 I do everything wrong 2017 I start to DB W says TLTL files for D PA w OM2 2018 I do LRT W drops filing and OM2 situation slowly improving
Journaling...I had a good fathers day for the most part. I woke up extremely early and I was the only one up for about 4 hours. It was nice, but I also got into my own head a bit thinking about the past. I know that it was a day for the kids to thank their fathers, but when the family is still not complete it was still hard.
The ex stopped by and dropped off some cheese cake for the 4 of us and said that she and the kids had a great time picking out my fathers day gift. I am a craft beer fan and most of them have very catchy names to them. They grabbed me all of the ones that made the 4 of them laugh. They might taste like $#*!, but the names are great. HAHA!
Staying busy with my church and men's group. It is keeping me centered on what is most important. Also making headway on the guitar. It is difficult because all of the songs that seem the easiest to play are some of those sad country songs. Need to improve so that I can get into some more genres of music.
I hope and pray that God's grace be enough for us all as we navigate these waters.
Me 49 W46 T25 M22 S22 D18 S13 W had EA Apr-Jul 2016 Dropped Bomb 7/9/16 ILYBINILWYA HER DIVORCE IS FINAL...8/18/17 Dropping the rope to SURVIVE & THRIVE!!!
