When they won't look you in the eyes...it is guilt/shame. Think about it, when you were a child and did something wrong and you knew it was wrong...you didn't look your parents in the eyes either.
People who lie also can't look you directly in the eyes.
In time, you may even notice the eyes look dull/dead or as we call them "shark eyes". This is part of the depression.
Thank you, Job. I suspect for my WAW it is feeling guilty rather than lying. What makes it strange is that her family all around her is super friendly to me. I wish they would talk to her.
It's best if the family doesn't say too much to her. It will only cause more headaches for all. The more people try to talk to her, the more determined she will be to do whatever it is she is doing.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Ok, thank you, Job. I read through the MLC signs thread and can honestly say my WAW is exhibiting so many of those behaviors, it is amazing. The random blaming, self centered behavior, ignorance of others, picking fights for the most random meaningless issues, Jekyll and Hyde. I’ve come to accept her behavior and just act as if and focus on this kids and myself. She keeps looking for ways to justify her decision and I feel she is running out of them. I am ready to start setting more boundaries once our separation agreement.is due to be extended, with next visitation dates. I will no longer stay in a hotel when I am in town and can be home. I will no longer let her drive the train. If she has an issue with me being home more than she wants, I will just leave early and come home late in the evening. I travel enough and am away from home that she is getting plenty of space. After 8 months of separation, I think I should be a bit more assertive.
What is your story? You are on moderation and every time you post, the moderators are getting notifications to approve your postings. If you would be so kind as to post your story, I can then remove you from moderation and we can offer you advice and support.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Job, Do you see any concerns with the approach I am thinking of regarding assertiveness? She may not like it and it affects connections, but I should not have to be the one that had to leave the house.
