Good to hear about IC. Because it is 2 weeks away, I suggest GALing your heart out will be a really important piece in maintaining your sanity until then.
I feel you about being a single parent. Think of it different now though - you have absolute control over how you parent your kids when they are with you. You can impart your values, undivided love, and attention to them. The logistical stuff can be improved upon - doing chores for them and what not. But, I find the idea of being a single parent liberating because I don't have to negotiate with W about a lot of the stuff. I also know that I bring unique strengths as the parent to my kids and they will flourish with me being their supporter and cheerleader.
For e.g. all my kids activities - art, soccer, reading, other physical activities - I am in a way better place to support and push them because they are also activities that I hold dearly to my heart. I am super into it so I know I can give them the best support compared to W.
I"m sorry. I think we all go through a stage, or dip in and out, where we are living a paradox. Loving someone but also having to detach emotionally from the same person who is hurting us and causing chaos. It is necessary to survive and protect what matters to us. Part of accepting a current reality, but it is a heart and mind f**k.
Day at a time. Keep your eyes on the prize of being the sane stable parent. You're doing just fine
Me: 53 H:38 T:20 M:14 BD ILYB etc 10/15, H diagnosed severe depression S 1/16 PA 4/16 H filed 1/17
