I feel like you're panicking because all of these ideas feel like pursuit to me. You need to go the other direction and give her way more space than she wants. No amount of explaining anything is going to make a difference and will just push her farther away.
The text you sent her did not cause this to happen. Relationships are incredibly complicated and unfold over the course of years. No single thing you did caused this to happen to you -- surrender to that fact.
Don't explain anything, limit your contact to the minimum -- and start another thread!
Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11 Start Reconcile: 8/15/11 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced) In a New Relationship: 3/2015
You're right, Acc, I am panicking. I still love my W and just want to let her know I still care for her despite all that is happening. Per your advice, and of others here, I'm keeping my feelings to myself and this Board and won't talk to her or try to reason with her.
I have to admit, being a part of the DB community has certainly help get me ready for this day. I don't know if DBing will work in my situation, but it has certainly made me a better person and forced me to do a lot of self reflection. I'm really enjoying my GAL. I just want to get the D over with now and get back to enjoying life again. My biggest worry is finding and affording a decent place to live.
Married 9, Together 13, Divorce in Progress M: 44, W: 44, S: 7 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/19/17
