Btw, it's nicer to flush Plumber asap rather than to turn to avoidant behaviours. Personally, I've always be appreciative when a lady is politely upfront. Women say they don't want to hurt men so they leave guys hanging trying to figure out what's going on...and that's not hurtful? Just do it! He's a big boy...and I'm sure he'll be glad tell you just how big, if he hasn't already lol!
Doodler, I thoroughly felt the emotion in your Haiku. I am afraid WII is correct, I am a bacon lover. So much, that a friend got me a few lbs of bacon as a wedding gift. (In addition to a monetary gift, lol). These days, I am only eating turkey bacon because of this "nutrition program"
WII, I completely agree with you, I am trying not to be an arse. I definitely have avoidant behaviors when it comes to stuff like this. I just tried to be straightforward, but not hurtful. I must have failed at getting the point across. I also hate to do it over text, so I will try on the phone the next time.
In better news, my taste for sushi is back. Now I can happily enjoy it once a week when D9 is with her dad.
Hey, if you've already told him the party is over then you owe him no more communication...if he's pushing past that then he's not respecting you and that's not ok. You don't owe him anything beyond a polite so long. Trust me, he got it...he just doesn't want to accept it. If that's the case, stick to silence.
Thank you all so much for giving me such good feedback, support and advice.
What I know about myself.
I am super sensitive. I am a super sensitive person who is also rock hard. it's a paradox within myself and can be hard for others to handle and myself to handle.
I make lots and lots of mistakes. Which is ok. Sometimes I repeat mistakes, but luckily, I catch myself pretty early and I have a much easier time dusting off and moving on. I don't beat myself up as bad.
Why can't I fully break this off? I don't know. Is it me, is it him, do I not want to feel like an arse? But holding off any longer will make me feel like one. Maybe a part of me hopes it will work out somehow some way. But it won't.
I have a very in order regimented life right now. Crazy busy, sometimes too much pressure to do all alone emotionally, but I think it's best if I just keep my order. Especially since my child is doing the best she ever has, and I don't know that I really want to rock that boat.
I really just am not in a place to be juggling dating right now. And I come to realize most men cannot handle ME. I don't need a man to live and while they think at first, "that's really attractive" I feel like they feel less of a man because of that and try to compensate in other ways. It's easy for a guy to take care of certain needs like paying for things, and the such. But the needs I have aren't ones many want to or are capable of fulfilling. They are the hard ones. And yes, I am not so easy to love, I realize that. I am a very hard shell with a very soft center. Life has kicked my butt, and this is the end result. Which I accept about me.
Will someone else accept it one day? Maybe, maybe not. He'd have to be one helluva strong man. And maybe to that person, I will, indeed, easy to love.
It's not you. It's the guys you are meeting. You are high quality. If my brothers were single i would set you up in a heart beat. I can only chalk it up to the region. Because seriously there is no other explanation.
You are smart and physically beautiful and emotionally mature. It's just hard finding someone that is of equal quality.
I'm going to have to disagree with whatitis - well at least in part. IF and I have to really be clear that IF you clearly told him you don't want to see him anymore and he's not respecting that, then I'd agree with WII. Thing is, I'm very willing to bet you were not clear. You've admitted you want to be nice, not hurt him , etc and I just bet that turned into a very non-comitle breakup. Some guys, actually most (myself included) need things in very clear terms. Not subtle, sweat, sugar coated double meanings. So you Have to be clear, no hedging no "I'm not sure if this is working" type language.
I fully agree we'd rather know. It's far nicer than stringing along. The sad thing here is, I'm told by many women that guys don't take it well which is part of why they don't come clean right away. Rather than a decent response they get mean or nasty or ask why or try to convince or whatever. This is why many online do what they do or don't respond at all after getting some very nasty responses.
Be clear, be firm and be final. Say goodbye and good luck or whatever. If he doesn't. Get it from That, it's on him.
Lol and remember when you first went out and he said you are different than anyone else he's ever dated? You thought that was the beginning of the end and he would dump you. Guess that didn't happen! .
DonH Midwest Me 56 WAW-EXW 55 Met 11/95 / Married 5/00 Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06 4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D
Absolutely Don, if she said clearly "I've enjoyed getting to know you but I don't think we're a match" then she's done her job...and that's being nice! Leaving it with anything less, isn't nice.
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