C'mon G, spill the beans (where the heck did that phrase come from?)!How was the date?
Well, I did reach a milestone of a 3rd date from someone I met online. We went out for sushi, I was freakin' starving. We had a nice dinner and conversation and we went back to his house and cuddled and watched a movie and aptly passed out. I woke up at 1am and went home.
He is very different from anyone I have ever dated. Some things I like, some I wish were different. And it's not major stuff. I began to overanalyze and compare on my drive to work this morning, but I decided to stop.
I'm really trying to go with the flow and not look down the road, but yes, there will be a date #4.
There are many reasons why I wish I didn't get divorced. But for real, starting over and over and over again is not how I imagined it. Working on a relationship with the person you married and the work you do to actively love that person is the work I'd rather be doing.
Don't get me wrong, I am making the best of my situation.
I truly and deeply loved my xW, but in hindsight, she was a difficult woman. I loved being married and I loved my family life, but that's gone. I see excitement and adventure in my future, and frankly, I'm giddy about the prospects of the future being so bright that I have to wear shades.
There are many reasons why I wish I didn't get divorced. But for real, starting over and over and over again is not how I imagined it. Working on a relationship with the person you married and the work you do to actively love that person is the work I'd rather be doing.
Don't get me wrong, I am making the best of my situation.
There are many reasons I wish I didn't get divorced too Ginger. Mostly financial but also the loss of a dream about growing old together, retiring, traveling, having fun with our grandkids. In my case that was more like a fairy tale.
It is eye opening to be dating a "normal" guy who actually likes me and enjoys spending time with me. Him also being divorced with kids is a bonus as he understands my triggers and all the crap we go thru with our exes.
The Plumber sounds fun, which is what I wish for you at this point. Someone who can understand you and the craziness in your life, who likes you, who respects you. Who is willing to "watch it" when you are uncomfortable with something. Someone you can cuddle with watching NetFlix without him demanding sex as payment.
Go with your gut hon, enjoy dating, stop over-analyzing and enjoy it.
Originally Posted By: doodler
I see excitement and adventure in my future, and frankly, I'm giddy about the prospects of the future being so bright that I have to wear shades.
Me too Life is what we make it. And love is a choice. Lets's choose love, choose happiness, and buy ourselves sunglasses!
Linda
Me 65, Ex 64 M 38 y 2 adult S, 4 G-Kids MLC 11/07 BD 12/09 D 3/14 Dating nice guy 7/14 Engaged to nice guy 12/17
That was apparently a fairytale in my case too, RL. But your new fairytale is very inspiring to me. Keeps me from not choosing to be the crazy cat lady who doesn't even like cats.
I know with my ex I would have been miserable. I know that. I wish the after dating could have been a heck of a lot easier. I wish I found my someone by now.
This guy probably isn't my someone. If the last one wasn't my someone, this one most likely isn't. But I am trying to be ok with that. I'm going to not over analyze, enjoy the cuddling and dating, and who knows, maybe I will be pleasantly surprised. Maybe we will just move on when we know it isn't going anywhere. For now, I am having a good time.
Doodler, it's not as miserable as I am making it sound. You should be excited. And maybe if you stop standing chicks up, you'll see!!!!!!
Ginger, seeing as how you mentioned past relationships ...here's a poem I wrote a few years ago which I've just revamped, it seems fitting
Makeover
Since you told me it was over My days with you were through I’ve had a complete makeover And here’s my full report to you. I’ve lost some 20 lbs, ya’ know Just can’t find where I put ‘em. I learned an ancient martial art And origami too. I joined a local YMCA This helps to keep me buff. I run for miles, can’t seem to stop And haven’t lost my lunch. I found the Lord while on my knees He was right there under the couch! I go to church and praise his name And pay my tithes, of course. I read and write cosmic poetry And do Karaoke on the side. I’ve found a therapist with comfy chairs And made friends a mile wide Women seem to like me too Don’t know what that one’s all about But I take what life will give to me And no longer seem to doubt. So life is now a joy to behold An adventure right out of the blue So recently it occurred to me Why the hell would I need you?