I was wondering what you think if you were my W and you came across my "Diary of an HD Monster" and my other posts? Would it freak you out? Or would it give insight into my mindset? Both? Motivate? Demotivate? Do nothing?
There are a couple points where I imply that I'm "questioning my love" sometimes. This seems like it would send a torpedo right into the recovery process. I fear that W is going to jump in here someday.
BTW...speaking of spouses getting on...where's Corri?
Anywhere is walking distance if you have the time
-Steven Wright
Corri has been on vacation last week and will return soon. I chatted with her yesterday. We all miss her terribly when she isn't around becuse we appreaciate her insights and wisdom.
I can say as a LDW, it would totally depend on the mood of the moment! If I was in a giving/receiving mood, I'd be shocked at first that you choose to 'air our dirty laundry in public', but I would keep reading.
If she is in a P***y mood, you might get the response " How dare you?!?! ", but it will totally come out of her embarassment/sadness over the situation.
I think at first she would be surprised with your feelings, but would soon either feel embarassed about hers, or feel extremely sad that she is so responsible for yours. I tried to put myself in her shoes, and I think I'd probably cry if my H was feeling so desperate/p***ed off/sad... Sad thing is, my H is probably feeling the same way, just hasn't posted here...that I know!
I'm not sure I would approach her with the URL, but I wouldn't worry that she will find it. If she does, it will be the truth, and she needs to know it. If I had never come on this site, I wouldn't even know there was a problem, because H had just pulled away emotionally, he didn't complain any more.
I am mortified at the thought of my W or even worse my DD16 or even worse one of my DD16's friends finding my posts. Try putting "SuperDave marriage" into Google and guess what the first result is? That is how far away I am from disaster. I could be the talk of DD16's school playground and everyone knows who SuperDave is.... I am tempted to get Michele to delete all my postings and come back as hairpup or something. SD
Just not even sure why anyone would google search 'Super Dave marriage', but I'm willing to bet it won't be your dd or her friends! They are much more likely to search for 'pop stars' or 'fashion'!
Now, if your W realizes there is such a thing as a place like this to post, and realizes you are spending some time posting to such a place, then she may have reason to 'google' you... I'm just doubtful it would lead to that.
I'd say if you are still really worried, start another name and leave your old one behind... delete posts if you must, but don't do it because you think the threat is great, because I don't really think it is!
SD, you have the ability to change your name. I was LDWife when I started posting here and now I'm Aquarian... just go to "My Home" and edit your preferences. You can change what your "name" is at any time.
Just so you know though, I personally feel you have absolutely nothing to fear or be ashamed of. You are such a sweetheart SD and if reading your posts wouldn't make her stand back and see what a wonderful husband you are, then your marriage isn't just sex starved. Chin up... you da man!
Quote: I am mortified at the thought of my W or even worse my DD16 or even worse one of my DD16's friends finding my posts. Try putting "SuperDave marriage" into Google and guess what the first result is? That is how far away I am from disaster. I could be the talk of DD16's school playground and everyone knows who SuperDave is.... I am tempted to get Michele to delete all my postings and come back as hairpup or something. SD
I hear ya! I intentionally picked a user name here that isn't even close to the one I use elsewhere. If H was to sign on and find this board (highly unlikely, as that would actually require some true effort on his part to research this LD situation) I know he would be mortified if he found my posts. I've also been clearing my browser "history" so he doesn't find this place. With my luck, he'll think I've been searching porn!
Changing your name...hmmm. Reinventing your identity? There's an interesting idea?
I bought that Nerve.com account sort of as a red herring. It's not so naughty that I'd be ashamed, but it's naughty enough to not want to get caught in the middle of the day looking at it. She did lean over me one night, and clicked the "search history" on google to see that I had been a good little boy and searching on things like "relationship help" and the best was "the marriage bed" which she thought was porn but turned out to be a christian-spun site for sex. Showed her how serious I am because I'm quasi-agnostic-buddhist-eastern philosophical-anti-organized-religion. Talk about a 180.
Anywhere is walking distance if you have the time
-Steven Wright
