Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers niryANa

My first thread was titled "Avidya" which is a Sanskrit word whose literal meaning is ignorance, delusion, unlearned and unwise.

Here is a link to Avidya:

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2597117&page=1

My second thread was titled "Vidya" which is also a Sanskrit word whose literal meaning is correct knowledge or clarity.

Here is a link to Vidya :

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2601644&page=1

My third thread was titled "Sati-sampajanna" means a clear understanding of reality appearing in the present moment.

Here is a link to Sati-sampajanna :

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2607958&page=1

My fourth thread was titled "Panna-vimutti" which means deliverance through wisdom.

Here is a link to "Panna-vimutti" :

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2614294&page=1

My fifth thread was titled "titikSate" whech means suffer with courage or patience, bear with firmness, endure patiently.

Here is a link to "titikSate" :

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2621248&page=1

My sixth thread was titled "kavikratu" which means one who possesses wisdom or sacrifices, full of discernment, having wise designs, having the insight of a wise man or fully wise insight.

Here is a link to "kavikratu" :

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2626380&page=1

My seventh thread was titled"zokasantaptamAnasa" which means one whose mind is consumed by sorrow.

Here is a link to "zokasantaptamAnasa" :

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2630847&page=1

My eighth thread was "Ksanti" which means exercising patience toward behavior or situations that might not necessarily deserve it and is seen as a conscious choice to actively give patience as if a gift, rather than being in a state of oppression in which one feels obligated to act in such a way.

Here is a link to "Ksanti" :

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2635276&page=1

My ninth thread was "paryutsukI bhavati" which is a Sanskrit word whose literal meaning is be sorrowful or regretful.

Here is a link to "paryutsukI bhavati" :

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2637883&page=1

My tenth thread was "siddhiyatrika" which is a Sanskrit word whose literal meaning means one who makes a pilgrimage to learn magical arts or to gain good luck or beatitude.

Here is a link to "siddhiyatrika" :

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2642255&page=1

My eleventh thread was "asambandha" which is a Sanskrit word whose literal meaning means non-connection, absence of congruity or connection.

Here is a link to "asambandha" :

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2646740&page=1

My twelfth thread was"jahita " is a Sanskrit word whose literal meaning meansforsaken, rejected, forlorn or abandoned.

Here is a link to "jahita" :

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2653242&page=1

My thirteeth was "atesja" it is the Sanskrit word which means dim, not vigorous, not bright, feebleness, absence of brightness or vigour, dullness, dimness, insignificance, shade, a shadow.

Here is a link to "atesja" :

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2661895&page=1

The name I have chosen to title this thread is the Sanskrit word "niryANa ".

niryANa is a sanskrit word which means death, exit, setting out, final emancipation, decamping, road leading out of a town, going forth or out, departure, going out.

I am on facebook, you know how to find me. Dinner with everyone now. Not hungry but must eat something.

Mu

This may be just about the worst advice to comment on.

You should never express your feelings on FB but pick your battles very wisely.

That way you can become a very close friend.

I am looking out for you

V

Dearest mutatio

I am so sorry that your wife was unable to recommit to your marriage. It is something we all long for. You are one person that can truly say that you stood by your marriage and committment in the most honorable way. You can live life free of regrets.

We all make mistakes in life. My father was never able to control his temper. My mother is one of the most spiteful people I have ever met. But people are not perfect. They make mistakes. They do not always act their best. Usually it is because they are hurting. Some of us stay committed and some of us do not. But we all have imperfections. I hope you will forgive yourself of yours.

mutation my friend,

We are on a similar journey. Keep your chin up. I also love my W but over the last week or two have grown stronger and have been able to assess that life will get better.

I will not stop DBing and you should not also!

I will keep you in my prayers every night!

Sorry to hear about the change in your sitch. You have my deepest sympathies.

You are a good man and need to remain as positive as possibly for your kids. It will be hard on them as well and they will look and take cues from you as to how to respond.

It stinks when they can't bring themselves to forgive or to let go of the anger, hurt and resentment. Try to remain an example of compassion for her, be a beacon. I often think of your words to me about compassion when dealing with my WW, particularly when talking about D. They have helped me tremendously and I hope you will remember them as well.

Grieve a bit more and then try to get some rest. Although it feels like the end of your world, you still have the rest of your life to live, so live it. Vaya con dios.

I have just caught up on the last few days. Firstly I am sorry for your pain. Your love has been unwavering despite your situation. That is pure love. You felt it and gave it regardless. For me that makes you a good man.

Mu, if the rest of what I say appears harsh, know that I say it out of genuine care for you.

You are reeling and spinning. I can understand that, but it is not helping you. You are making all the rookie mistakes which is not good especially seeing how long you have been here. Begging and pleading NEVER work. Stop that immediately.

You need to refocus on you, your kids and your future. This is nit the time to make rash decisions.You need to get yourself to a better place mentally.PPlease hold off making big decisions.

I understand your heartbreak and despair. I truly do. But part of me us glad that your situation has changed. Like everyone else here I would have preferred the change to be the opposite. Why say this when you are down? It is not to add to your woes. But being inflicted to such ongoing treatment is not good for you. Now you can grow.Seize that chance. Again don't be rash. Take your time. I was always amazed how you readily were going to live that for another two years. By amazed I mean in a good way that you were without hesitation willing to do that.

Now you need to accept what has been evident for a long time.Your R with W is over. Your M is over. You need to accept that for your own sake. Mut' let her go. I am not saying burn your love or that it cannot be restored later. I am saying it cannot be restored NOW.

Seeing as I am being hard on you, I'll add something.II find it suspicious that W prolonges her stay away with her boss the same weekend she announces D. If she is cheating on you, I would prefer that to be the reason she tells kids about the D and not this bullshiit about how you were all those years ago. Do not buy into that. I don't want this to become your focus but I would look into it.

Best wishes mate. Breath make some short term goals and focus on that.

Thank you all for your support. Yesterday was a rough day. Today is new and all is well. I am sad but I did my best. I am proud of the effort I put in and that's all that matters. Thank you

Roiste, I'm done, it's over, her life is her business. I am done. Thanks for the advice, it's good. I am relieved, be well

Good for you. Glad you are in a better place today. Yes her life is her business. What I said was more about not letting her blame you wrongly if there is a different real reason in her life.

So what is this new relieved Mut going to do? Keep posting I hope.

Best wishes

The truth is for most everyone here is that our marriages are over at bomb drop.

Whether we get to build new ones or not is part of the question, which will only be answered after we truly
LET GO

Maybe you are starting the process now.