Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Midlife Crisis I am content, that is a blessing.......

I might be wrong, but your h showed you the photos of your son doing weed whacking to get your reaction. I do hope your son had on safety glasses as those things can toss up stuff and hit the eyes.

I think you handled that conversation very well.

Hi and Happy Easter eve, as my S calls it. Lol. Eggs are colored, I snuck in my room and have the plastic eggs filled with goodies to hide in the wee hours while S is asleep. Other than that, nothing special planned. H asked the other day, if I had Easter plans, I told him, just the normal egg hunt at home. I left it at that. If he wants to come, up to him to say something.

He just sent a TM. It was to me, his mom and dad. It was his first mini movie with his new drone with a camera, he said he will get better with practice. It goes over his property, over some orchards, and over the Anderson dam next to him. At the end, the drone lands, facing him, sitting alone against the barn. He has music playing with it. It is actually really cool. My first thought was, this is what he spends his time doing! Then his mom responded right away, "they say practice makes perfect" Then she added that her step son in law said to use it to find him good fishing spots.

I got this rage of heat that came over me. No compliment from her whatsoever, how did I never notice this?? I got an overwhelming feeling to protect H. Then his dad responded with, wow, I need to watch you do this. Well, that was better. So I said, wow H. You did a great job! I told him, S asked, daddy made this? And that he said it was really cool.

H responded to tell S he can make one too, tomorrow or next weekend. I didn't respond....

Not much to update. Very busy week again at work. I am feeling much better. Thursday night I joined neighbors to speak with our city traffic engineer to deal with speeding on our street. I so enjoyed meeting all my neighbors! After, H had to bring S home because he had an early morning meeting. He told me S had not done his 30 minutes of reading homework, it was 9:30 at night. I did not give him a bad time, but boy I am ready for his next parenting lecture....

I finally found a birthday gift for H, with S thumbs up. They are 2 remote control tanks that you battle against each other. Something he can play with S, I think he will like it.

Enjoying a nice weekend with S. I hope you all are too! I am watching Frozen, I am such a little girl at heart. Plus, "let it go" has huge meaning for me!!

Ick. H just TM again asking about tomorrow, if any plans he can join, anything he can bring? I told him, only thing planned is egg hunt when S wakes up, that we will be home all day, and he is welcome. He asked what time the egg hunt is. (He doesn't know? We have only done this every year) I told him S usually wakes around 7. I added he can come hide the eggs and sleep with S so I can sleep! Ha ha. Or I can try to make S wait... H answered shoot, he was already cozy in bed and should have asked earlier because he would have done that. He said he will try to be here early. I told him, see him then if he makes it....S says he is doing the hunt when he wakes up. If daddy is not here, he can just show him what he got.

Then, group TM by MIL, asking H if this (videos with the drone) is going to be his stress reliever. Stress??? The man has no responsibilities other than going to work each day...she irritates me so much. Especially to include me in that group TM.

I will not, will not, let H or his family change my mood. I am excited about tomorrow morning, it's almost like Christmas for us, and I don't care if H makes it or not. It is his loss, completely. I just have this feeling he will show up, late and scattered, disruptive....I suppose at some point I will be in a place to do this stuff separately. Not there yet, but feeling closer. I would so love to have it, just S and I, but I do it for S, I want him to have family memories, not separated memories. Does that make sense? However, I am starting to wonder if H constant drama and sometimes flakiness with joining us is causing more damage than if he just wasn't here....we will see how it goes tomorrow.

Good night and Happy Easter Eve

Your son spoke some wise words...he's not waiting on his father to show up to hunt eggs...he's going to go ahead and do it and then show him what he got. Your son knows the score.

As for your MIL...I noticed that all she could say was practice makes perfect. She gives no encouragement at all. It's any wonder her children are screwed up.

I do hope that you and your son will enjoy your day. I'm sure he'll find all of the hidden eggs in record time.

Happy Easter!

Thanks Job, I thought the same thing about what S said. Obviously he too is at a point where he will not wait on H. He is a smart spunky kid.

Well, I must report, I was completely wrong. My eyes opened out of a deep sleep this morning, 20 seconds later I hear H text tone coming from my phone in the kitchen. I looked at the clock, it was 7:08. I was impressed! Quietly I got up to get my message, S was still asleep, and H said he was on his way, asked if I wanted anything from McDonald's. I let him know S was still asleep, that I would leave the front door unlocked for him. About 10 minutes later he was here, right when S woke up, it was perfect timing.

S jumped into his arms, he was so happy to see him. The egg hunt was on. H commented on how many eggs were around, inside and out, giving me a big smile. After, S asked that I make crepes. While I cooked, H and S were curled up together on the couch, chatting and watching a show. I took a picture, it was so cute, and thought to myself, this is exactly why I don't tell H no when he wants to join us. How can I be the one to take those moments away from them? I just can't. They both loudly appreciated the crepes, S even yelled, yay for mommy!

After, H was asleep and snoring within 5 minutes of eating. I asked S if we should cover him with a blanket. S said no, let's just let him sleep.

After about 45 minutes of dozing, H was back up. He had told me he brought his drone and motioned to me that he was going to get it. All of a sudden, there it was, in front of our back sliding glass door, staring at us. S screamed, dog went crazy. I tried to go outside to see it up close and dog knocked me back into the house to go after it! Lol, she always does that when she protects me. H flew it all around our house. He is so proud of this thing. He came back in, showed us the full video he took yesterday, with my encouragement. I also asked if I could join him and S to use it sometime, it really is fun. H said, yes, of course!!

He left about 11:30, told S to pick a place with mommy to take the drone to.

All in all, it was a nice visit. H was not my H, he was very tired, very obsessed with his drone and iPad he uses to fly it, we would only get fragments here and there of his attention. But he was very polite, friendly and appreciative of being here.

Happy Easter to all, hope you are having a good day.

Oh, I keep forgetting to mention, H has been bringing up memories from when we first started dating. He has done it the last few get togethers and again today. He will just mention, remember when we went to this place or that? But that will be all he says about it. Not sure why.

Well, wonders never cease! He was there on time for a change. I guess he was as excited about the day as your son was. I have a feeling the drone had something to do w/him being on time and wanting to share it w/you and your son.

Overall, it sounds like everyone enjoyed themselves. I'm glad things went okay today.

He's remembering the fun places that you two went. That's a good memory for him. Keep listening and validating. Those memories are what he needs to think about right now.

Hang in there!

Glad you had a nice Easter and that h posted on time. Sounds like he was quite motivated to celebrate it.

Yes, my kids still wanted an egg hunt this year. I expecting them to say they wanted to close the chapter on that book. Nope. I tried to tell them the bunny was getting a bit old to be hopping around. They told me no excuses allowed. Hmm.

As for your h's trip down memory lane, that's all good!

H gave S and I a bit of a scare tonight! I took S to H like normal, H let me know when he was home like normal. H usually comes outside to greet us, but didn't. S asked, where is daddy? I said, don't know, maybe he is on a work call? So we get all S stuff and head to house. Knock, no answer, walk in, door unlocked. I yell, hello????? Nothing. S heads in, I stay at door. S comes back and says, H is asleep! I say, where? S says, on the couch. He tells me, IPad is on, in his lap, in the middle of a message....

That worried me. I again yelled, hello?? H??? Nothing. So I head in to the dreaded, horrible, house H left me for that I hate. Crap everywhere, I try not to look around...come around the corner....there is H. Head to the side, IPad on. I get next to him, say...H?? Nothing. A bit louder....H?? Nothing. So I grab his arm and shake him! H?? He jumps awake. Says, what happened?? Was I asleep??

I say, yes! You were not answering us, you scared us!! He started saying, I don't know what happened, I was sending a message and that is the last thing I remember...I just cut him off and hugged him from behind. S grabbed him around the neck and hugged him, it was a weird moment....

I let go and headed out to leave. H kept going on how strange that was...I had to go to meet a friend....but driving away, I thought more about it. I figured he was just asleep, but it scared me! S too! Then I thought about him oversleeping last week, falling asleep yesterday, now this?

I had dinner plans with my girlfriend, but checked in with him after dinner to make sure he was ok. He said he got woken up at 2:30 in the morning by the call service for work and wasn't able to fall back to sleep, that he was just tired. He said he didn't even know he fell asleep until he woke up with S and I looking at him like he was a ghost! Lol. I said, yes, we got spooked because he wasn't responding and I was about to do CPR! I told him don't do that again.

Really weird.

Your h was totally exhausted, not only by the service call but also keeping masks on when he's around people. It's also the depression working on him.