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Hey nate. I'm just a couple weeks behind you. Got my final papers in the mail yesterday. I too am in Indiana. I really have nothing to offer right now, except hello and I hope you are doing well. I drank to escape for a long while. My xw had a miscarriage early in our M and withdrew emotionally. Then I did the same. So I see some common things with you.

Be well. Work on you. Everything will be great again one day.

Hello DDay, thanks for your support! Reality definitely sets in when you get those final papers huh? I would say I'm not sure I really felt better or worse after getting them but I did feel different. Glad the legal crap was over with for sure and ready to move on from the old M and see what is in store for me. Whatever that may be.

sorry to hear about your sitch but hang in there brother. Like you said our days will be great again!

Sandi do you think that I should never reach out to her and just reply to her after she contacts me? Just curious what your thoughts were.

Her birthday is coming up at the end of the week and late last week when we were exchanging texts I asked her if she would like to go do something for her birthday. She hasn't responded to that yet and I don't really have any expectations of a yes. I think she will respond later this week and I'm just wondering should I just act like it's no big deal because it really isn't to me and I just thought I would ask...or don't even respond to her reply and yes or now to wishing a happy b-day...thanks!!!

I finally finished the book and there is some very good stuff in there. I just wish I would have read it sooner! Happy Friday DBers!!!

Hello All,
Have there been very many on the forum to get divorced and get an ex back? Do you feel it is harder to come back from a divorce vs. saving the R before it got to that?

Basically in my sitch I feel my only option is to totally detach and move on and see what happens.

My hat goes off to you that DBed and saved the M!

Detaching is going pretty good so far except the winter blues I go through every year seem to suck a little more this year.

She had been reaching out pretty regularly but hasn't in a couple weeks. I have no desire to contact her but I will talk to her if she calls.

Is there ever a point that I should reach out or just put it in her hands and if she never contacts again then that's it?

Still detaching and I feel it is going well...

Have there been very many on the forum to get divorced and get an ex back? Do you feel it is harder to come back from a divorce vs. saving the R before it got to that?

nate

Sorry you are here and there is great support/stories here

I have read a few that have gotten to the D stage/filing and still saved the marriage

I am sure there are divorced stories too that work out but I will try to go back and find the link of success stories

Personally i am in a position of a STBX as papers are coming. I am angry & resentful so not sure I personally could R in the short term. Lots of things I need to figure out for myself as I am sure you do too

If you keep takng care of yourself you never know what could happen!

Hello Rich,
I have been catching up on your sitch and I'm sorry for what you are going through. I have been there and no matter where it goes it will get better...hang in there brother!

To me it does suck I am divorced but I'm also glad all of it is past me as well. The old R was dead so those final papers kind of gave me a little closure. I would be a liar if I said I still don't think about her a good portion of everyday but it is slowly getting better. I'm starting to rebuild a and continue to take care of me. You are right because we never know what might happen....thanks for your reply!

Hello all,
still working on detaching and GAL..so far so good but I still have my moments where I miss her terribly. It has been about a month since we have had any contact.

hang in there everybody..I feel your pain. Take care!!!