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Whats' BDP? She is going thru pre menopause and has had a tough time wiht it and is up and down alot

Pre-menopause?

That would explain some things.

My wife had her thyroid removed in April. A couple months later her personality and mood changed.

BPD is bi-polar disorder. My W demonstrated a lot of the same behaviors. She wasn't bi-polar. She was a WAS on a mission to reach her happy place and I was in the way. I was the target of her outburst...same as you.

I agree with what the others have posted. Try to ignore it as much as possible. My WW accused me the other day of locking her out of our joint bank account. Although I wanted to tell her she is crazy and ask her if she logged in correctly, I replied that I hadn't and left it at that. She texted a little while later to let me know she got in. No apology, but at this point, I didn't expect one. Regardless, I avoided an argument and that is a good thing right now.

Talking less is better.

Definitely not BiPolar

Just going awal on her feelings that seem to feel sometimes like she is so angry with me about our past and relationship that she really has voiced things she hasn't in the past. I read a ton about Pre Menopause and wish I knew about this earlier on as its so tough on a woman and really is a huge change in feelings and how the brain is wired. Not the reason for my sitch but doesn't help

I too am in her way on reaching her happy place as she wants her old self back.

We had an interesting text thing going on as my D said on the phone as I am traveling "you are the best dad in the world" I had to walk back into my hotel room as i was leaving when she said this and cry.....i am a mess lately

My STBX texted me that my D loves me and i am the best dad...it was nice but not what i wanted to hear of course from her....but you can't get blood from stone. She did say she cried a bit too when my D said that to me when she got home. Gave me props in the text about how good I am at what i do at work and people love working for me

Felt like a pat on the head and a nice little good bye treat. I tried not to read into it at all.

And I think I went way backwards today with some more texts from her

How hard it was for her too with all of this. And I said too much via text without just being like "OK...that is great"....just validating things

I feel like I set myself back into where we were a few months ago with me being desperate and begging. So frustrating.....I got sucker punched

I have not thought about an EA but those who know of my situation keep saying she would never be this way without something else going on . Part of me says who cares....if that is the path she has chosen...let it be.

The other says do what I can to find out the truth if she won't be honest.

this [censored]...

If you are ever going to apply the LRT, don't you think it would be when papers were served? I mean, why were you not already doing it? What are you waiting on?

You are right....not really sure...maybe a miracle?

Are there any good links to LRT?

it is all in divorce remedy. I also recommend a coaching session if you haven't. They tend to get more detailed into your situation and sometimes you will get a little different advice than on here.

Do you mean perimenopause - the transition toward menopause? As far as I know, premenopause is pretty much just PMS.

I think you have no option but to go LRT. There's a reason it's a last resort, and I think you're there right now. I haven't used it, but I want to warn you that it looks hard. Post here often to stay on track - you absolutely need to stay consistent for it to work. Half-a$$ed ain't gonna cut it.