I'm falling asleep tired and will post more tomorrow. Just know that what comes out of his mouth isn't important, whatever it is. It will be about the actions of the next 3-6 months, not the words of the next 3-6 hours. Hang in and know you are in my prayers Rain.
Me:38 XW:38 T:11 years M:8 years Kids: S14, D11, D7 BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15
Rain...that was a very brave, strong thing you did and I think you should be proud of yourself for having the courage to reach out. It's not easy when you've been hurt so many times, but I think this was something that was very much needed. Here is hoping for a good outcome, but the strength to know you will be OK whatever comes.
Sleep well tonight and will check in on you in the morning.
Rain, I am so glad that you did that. Now he knows what the boundaries are...what you NEED from him and what you will/won't accept. The ball is now in his court. He has to decide what it is that he wants. And, I agree with Zues that you need to wait to see what he does. What comes out of his mouth immediately or even over the next week or two could change multiple times as he is confused, scared and unsure right now. I am proud of you for having the courage to put it all out there for him. Great job!!
M:45 H:48 M:11 No kids BD:Sept'15 EA:Confirmed 1wk later PA: Oct'15 12 '15 2 wk R Just kidding, H wants NC 12 '15 H back w/OW 4 '15 R &still working on it
Thinking of you, Rain. Stay strong and go dark for sure until you hear from him. I agree 100% with MB. What he says could change and his first words could be testing you. Don't back down. You've drawn the line and it's up to him to man up now. You deserve all good things and nothing less.
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
Thanks NYGal. He never responded last night but this morning I woke up to a message saying he thanks me for analyzing him and wishes me a good day.
What the...?!
I did not analyze him. I have admitted here when I've gone crazy and screamed and berated him. When I have thrown his A in his face etc. I did none of that in the voicemail. And my tone was even. The only real emotion I showed was at the end when I cried some.
I guess I will ignore that part of the message. Thank him, wish him a good day and move on.
Hope you had a good day yesterday after talking to your manager.
Rain (moi): 40 Ex Fiance: 39 3 kids On/off again EA & PA Last BD by ow 12/15 Moved kids and myself back into our own place: 12/15
MB, you said you're proud of me but I am a mess. LOL I had the worst dream and woke up feeling beaten down. He contacted me this morning as I put in my reply to NYGal.
He says I analyzed him. It seems no matter what I say or how I say it, he takes it in as a negative. Some of that is my fault because I have been known to sock it to him pretty badly. But I can't change him or how he sees me.
Rain...that was a very brave, strong thing you did and I think you should be proud of yourself for having the courage to reach out. It's not easy when you've been hurt so many times, but I think this was something that was very much needed. Here is hoping for a good outcome, but the strength to know you will be OK whatever comes.
Sleep well tonight and will check in on you in the morning.
Thanks Anna...honestly I went back and forth with myself a lot. It IS hard when you've been hurt so much and in so many different ways. And after the case of the missing condoms I just did not know if I wanted to put myself out there again. Also he did not respond favorably, however at least I know he listened to it like he promised.
Thanks guys for checking on me and rooting for me and our family. Only time will tell. I need to work on me and my STFU-ness and leave him to it.
I'm falling asleep tired and will post more tomorrow. Just know that what comes out of his mouth isn't important, whatever it is. It will be about the actions of the next 3-6 months, not the words of the next 3-6 hours. Hang in and know you are in my prayers Rain.
I hope you got some rest Zues. 3-6 months seems like both so little time and yet an eternity. Thank you for your prayers. I can use all I can get.
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
I just ignored his analyzing comment and thanked him then said "enjoy your day too". He replied back "enjoy what?!"
Whatever that means. He is home today due to the weather. He could come see the kids. But he didn't yesterday and I don't expect him to do it today either. At least our daughter is feeling better.
Also, the money I gave him that he needed for "tires" was spent once again on the cam girls. He doesn't know that I know but I won't fall for it again. I will be at his job bright and early come payday. He is going to be homeless soon giving away all of his money like that. But he's a big boy.
