Well, I AM getting a haircut today, so I MIGHT look half way decent... I'll think about it.
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
See? You don't want to waste a fresh haircut sitting around the house in sweats feeling bad. Force yourself to do these things. Have a good time whether you want to or not.
I think if you go depends on how crappy you'll feel. If only awkward or weird go. If you'll be devastated to see them don't.
That being said I think the ideal is if you can go and show that you're OK without her. Not because you're with someone else who's cuter, but because you don't need her
Me-38 W-38; T-15 M-12; S10 and S6 BD - July 2016; EA confirmed; confronted Aug 2015 EA dissolved 12/2016
Never make someone a priority when all you are to them is an option - Maya Angelou
I actually do think she still cares. Maybe not in the way I would like, but I think she does. This is all so confusing for me. I'm placing all my faith in these methods and hoping they work. I don't think there's a better method, but I don't have a lot of hope I guess. On the one hand, it seems like there's a good chance for us: 1) The breakup was hard for both of us and she said a lot of positive things about the relationship. 2) She was never mean or cruel during the process. 3) She wants to be fair re my financial situation. 4) She said she has "serious concerns" about OW, and that "something isn't quite right but I don't know what..." 5) She says she's not happy right now, and friends have said that she's struggling.
But then I think I really want one more talk with her. We sort of drifted apart at the end, and it's really hard for me. I know I don't want to beg or plead, and I don't want to hear that she's happy with OW. And I know I can't control what I hear from her, so I shouldn't have the talk at all. It just hurts so much and I'm still crying every day since I first heard there was someone else in early November, right through early January when she said she's moving forward with the OW. Words that still cut like a razor.
I just set up another phone session with my coach for tomorrow. I try and I try, but I'm so fragile and so sad.
NO MORE TALKING WITH W!!! Seriously. Drop the darn rope.
Live your life and embrace it! The world's your oyster. You're still looking in the rearview window at W. Know what happens when people keep looking at the rearview mirror? You will hit the tree that's in your path.
No more talking to W. I know you're hurting. For now, you are going have to forget about W. You are not #1 for her right now.
Who's looking out for #1? No one, but YOU. Then start with that. I am telling you that the A with the OW will collapse in due course. It won't happen today. It won't happen 2 weeks. It won't happen in 2 months. It will be MONTHS AND MONTHS before it all falls apart.
Then whatchagonna do in the meantime? Sit in a dark room and watch the amazing life pass by "out there."
Yeah! Get an haircut, buy a new outfit, new perfume, new lipstick....
Be the awesome NEW you!!!
Boy walking with confidence will blow EVERYONE away. I do this a lot. Oh and I smile at everyone. Say "hi" to people walking down the street, entering a building, etc....it does work. Try that, NYG.
DO.NOT.TALK.WITH.W! Even if I have to, I'll crawl through the computer monitor/tablet and grab you.
Let the skittish squirrel come to you. That's how we do it here in DBland.
Heck, I am even DBing one or two gals....it WORKS. Yep, those principles work when it is actually applied and adhered to faithfully.
I'm not sure it will make me happy or not. I don't want to have to see OW. I'm not detached enough yet. But I'm the one that set this up with friends, and they've decided to go whether or not I go. Oh well.
This ins't the time to act like a scaredy cat. Rock it like Cindy Crawford with that megawatt smile! Confidence. Smile. Swish those hips.
You have DONE nothing wrong here. Who cares if the OW is there. She's nothing. Not worthy of your grace. I've done this with certain people: Not giving them the time at all. Yeah, they feel small and they slink away. I only do this with those who are truly assholes.
Bring your A-game to the game! You got this, baby!
NYGal, I'm late for lunch so I don't have time to talk much, but wanted to say GET YOUR BUTT OUT OF THE HOUSE AND GO TO THE GAME!!!!!!!!! You love the games and they are important to you so you should GO! Don't let W take that away from you too. You get dressed up, take a friend and sit in a different section so you don't have to see W or OW. Wherever they sit, sit about 5 rows down so you won't hear them and can't possibly see them without turning around. Then laugh, lean over and talk to your friend, and ACT AS IF you are having the best time of your life. You can do this. If you don't turn around, you can just pretend like they aren't even there. Let me know how it goes AFTER you get home from the game tonight! If I, being as shy as I am, can get up and sing karaoke in a bar (I do not do bars!!!), then you can sit through a basketball game with a cute girl. .
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
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