Just catching up on your thread. Very similar to my sitch in many ways. I really liked this quote from Mowgli and thought it applied to me too:
Originally Posted By: Mowgli
When I finally realized that there was literally nothing in my power I could do to "make" W come back, I found that freedom. I tried far too hard to control the situation; far too hard. But when I let go and started to become the man I wanted to be, that's when I found my peace. I knew then that no matter what happened, I'd come out of this awful place better, stronger and ready to take the world head on; I was no longer a passenger.
I have been getting occasional impulses to detach and GAL, but have been having trouble following them whole-heartedly. I am scared of not being able to, remaining stuck a sitting duck, waiting for failure to kick me to the curb. I know I need to get off my a$$ and GAL but find it really hard to make the leap of acceptance and actually move forward. The comfortable idea of what the past was to me is still so near, so tangible, so tempting to want to crawl back to. Especially when my W is trying to work on the M... it actually makes it harder to detach in a way.
You are not alone, bro... will keep an eye on your thread. Take care!
Me: 39 W: 36 M: 8 yrs T: 10 yrs S: 7 W started coming out with the truth: 9/26/15 W finished coming out with the truth: 11/12/15 W started sleeping in guest BR: 11/13/2015
Last edited by Cadet; 12/18/1502:12 PM. Reason: Link
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.