azzork youre right, i have been doing all the opposite from the rules given to me. I have decided to not answer her txt at all. I already called my lawyer and told her i am looking for my rights as a father, i need custody not a divorce. I have an appointment this coming monday. I will no longer contact her. this is going to be hard.
She has gotten her way all her life. She has gotten her way in this relationship since the first day we dated. She has never said sorry about anything. I feel like she just used me as a toy and got bored and just threw me to the trash. This time she will not get it her way. I fought so hard to give her the wedding she always wanted. I will not give in to her easy divorce. I will stand my ground, she will no longer disrespect me as she always has. I am a new man. This new man doesnt take her bs.
You're all over the place angel. One minute you plan on giving it to God and the next it seems you're out for vengence. Remember this, the dysfunction that existed in your M was not only dud to her. You played a role in that also and contribute to it just as much as she did. So careful not going too far and punishing her because of her "bs".
Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be
I am going by gods word, i read a verse that stood out to me which said "be merciful to the merciful,with the purified show yourself pure be kind to the kind, be but is also said , but to the contaminated to be tortuous. I looked up what tortuous means, and said repeated turns or bends , highly involved tortuous legal procedures. When i read legal, i immediately said "lawyer".
What do you guys recommend when your wife tells you she wants an easy divorce , and easy way out. Do you agree ? Or should i get my lawyer for custody rights of my daughters, and let her file for divorce since that's what she wants.
I find out what your legal rights are. Let her bring whatever she wants to you and you review if you don't think it is fair or what lawyer reccomends then you make some changes and try to work together. If it is not working then suggest lawyers become involved.
M 37 W 34
T 12 M 8 D 7 S 4
Need break 4/12/15 W no ring 7/7/15
Separate room 4/12/15 Separate living suggested 8/15 W moved out 11/1/15
Don't think about the divorce right now, if it happens, it happens, she can file if she wants to, and you can have a lawyer's advice.
She said herself in her message to you - she opened the door - right now, it's about what is best for the children. Take her on her word and talk to the L about a plan for your children and immediate access.
M 16 yrs, WH62, P54 3 adult blended kids EA 11/13, BD1 6/14 PA fall 14, BD2 2/15 Piecing 2015, BD3 12/15 Separated 4/16 WH moved OW in 5/16 Divorced 6/15/17
If only she would see that the best for the children is to be united. The best for the children is for both of us to fight for this family because our daughters deserve it. Our daughters deserve to have a family me and her never had as children. When i would write her i never wrote to her, but i wrote about the marriage. The marriage is not about her, the marriage is about me , her , my 2 daughters and the Lord. I wish she would understand that, but i didnt reply to her txt. I just ignored it. I mean she ignored me for 4 weeks.
If only she would see that the best for the children is to be united. The best for the children is for both of us to fight for this family because our daughters deserve it.
Sigh. Nope. It doesnt work like that.
Thats what you think is best. She feels harassed, smothered, neglected...why would she come back to that? You think holding her prisoner in a relationship she doesnt want ill lead her to be a better mother?
Originally Posted By: angel r
Our daughters deserve to have a family me and her never had as children.
I completely agree.
What steps are you taking within yourself to foster that type of environment? What changes are you making within yourself that would interest and reattract your W?
Originally Posted By: angel r
When i would write her i never wrote to her, but i wrote about the marriage. The marriage is not about her, the marriage is about me , her , my 2 daughters and the Lord. I wish she would understand that, but i didnt reply to her txt. I just ignored it. I mean she ignored me for 4 weeks.
You are right, a marriage is not about just one person. It is about your family. But you are so focused on trying to get HER to see YOUR way that you arent willing to look at things from her point of view. It is clear that your opinion is "Im right and you are wrong". Until you can learn to see things from the other side, there is NO CHANCE that she will ever consider coming back.
LEAVE. HER. ALONE.
Not only physically. But mentally.
Stop focusing so much on her. Focus on you.
What can you do to make sure your next relationship succeeds? What can you do to prepare yourself for that?
