ive been sending her txt the pass 4 days but she only response with yes,no and ignores the txt completely. I asked her if i could at least video talk with my 3 yr old and she ignored it. im so frustrated , she is really hitting me low blow where it hurts the most , my pride and joy which are my 2 girls. One is 3 the other is 7 months.
But that will raise as a problem as well. I know it! For example 3 weeks ago i told her i wanted to plan to save up in order to take vacation trip to mexico city in december, and she was excited for it. After looking at the plane tickets a week later i notice they were 1k a pop, which i than decided to tell to tell he to wait and plan it for summer instead since it would be cheaper. After a week her mom offered to drive to mexico city and my wife said that would be a better idea and cheaper way to go on vacation. I firmly said NO. Because of the whole situation down there and danger of driving. Well she said i was being selfish and having a "macho attitude" which she hates , just because i just threw that idea out the window. When im not nice, it back fires on me. Last time she wanted to buy a small cake from krogers and i said NO. Because im working on my budget and i cant be spending right now. OH THAT BLEW HER OFF. She stated that i was downsizing her that she cant believe im saying no to a small 3$ cake, she cant be living like this were she doesnt even have the luxury to buy a small craving. OMG at the end we just bought the cake after a long 2 hour argument. Im just walking on egg shells it's depressing. My self esteem is at all times low. Even when me and her would get intimate (rarely) she would only do 2 positions because any other position made her feel like a whore and i had to make sure i do what she says because if not she would just get off and walk off. While im typing this i really dont know what i am doing with her? She is the most beautiful girl ive been with but probably the ugliest attitude ive known. But she is the mother of my girls , she is my wife, therefore im doing everything i can to make this work.
My first daughter is 3 years old the second one just turned 8 months 3 days ago, and i couldnt see her I even play her baby music at nights before going to sleep. She is hitting me where it hurts the most , and ive never done nothing wrong to her. Nor have i cheated or insulted her or hit her. Maybe ive insulted her by catering to her????
It would be a hard decision, i believe anyone can change. Maybe she needs to see a counselor? but the problem is that she wont. I have high hopes. I married this woman for better or worst. I have faith. Unless of course i see her talking to another man, theres a limit to my kindness.
So i have a counseling meeting today at 4pm, it's a church's counseling for married people. I txt my wife last tuesday if she would love to join me , and just just replied with NO. I think is unfair that she wont join me since she once suggested to go to couples counseling when we were dating and i said yes. I am thinking of txt her reminding her that counseling is still going at 4pm and to please join me. My txt would go something like this{ Hello we are still on for counseling at 4pm on the 6th floor, if you feel like we can still get through this please come join me, if you feel like we are done and theres no way of fixing it than dont show up. Dont txt back i will know the answer when i get to the counselor.
No, I don't believe it's a good idea. Every time you want to "remind" her of anything, you are putting pressure on her. It's not productive pressure. It will make her more rebellious and stubborn to what you want.
She does not feel in love with you. Would you pressure some person who didn't love you to go to couple's counseling? I don't know that counseling works on a person who resents it.
Step away from her and leave her alone. Read the links on Cadets post. They will give you needed information. Read carefully the detachment link.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Right now, I don't think you can do anything but leave her to figure out what she wants. But you can not let her keep the children away from you. You have no rights to her - she is free to go, her behavior may have consequences, but she's an adult. Maybe she needs a taste of life without you treating her like a princess?
I would tell her: "I can't control you, if you don't want to stay you are of course free to go. However, you have taken our children, which you don't have the right to. We need to agree on a custody arrangement, and you need to give me the physical location of our children today."
If she refuses, I would talk to a lawyer or the police. You can report your children missing.
And yes, she could be suffering from a post-partum hormonal disturbance, did her behavior change dramatically from before the children were born?
M 16 yrs, WH62, P54 3 adult blended kids EA 11/13, BD1 6/14 PA fall 14, BD2 2/15 Piecing 2015, BD3 12/15 Separated 4/16 WH moved OW in 5/16 Divorced 6/15/17
