Today I told her that I was going to take my D2 to the zoo on sunday. I felt bad not telling her to come with us but, I stayed strong,
Why did you tell her what you were doing? It makes it seem like you're competing. "Look at this fun thing you're missing." Why not just do it and let D2 tell her what you did?
Originally Posted By: desp13
also this week Im supposed to start packing and I was going to do it by myself, but its also her responsibility so I told her that she needed to come and help me pack.!
Was that the right call?
Start packing for what? Not sure it's s great idea to be telling a WAW what they "need" to do.
Today I told her that I was going to take my D2 to the zoo on sunday. I felt bad not telling her to come with us but, I stayed strong,
Why did you tell her what you were doing? It makes it seem like you're competing. "Look at this fun thing you're missing." Why not just do it and let D2 tell her what you did? ok didnt see it that way, well I could always change plans and do something else maybe something that my d2 hasn't done yet..
Originally Posted By: desp13
also this week Im supposed to start packing and I was going to do it by myself, but its also her responsibility so I told her that she needed to come and help me pack.!
Was that the right call?
Start packing for what? Not sure it's s great idea to be telling a WAW what they "need" to do.
well when she MO I had to tell the landlord that we weren't renewing the lease so it expires in two weeks so I need to start packing but there is still a lot of of her stuff in the house mainly stuff that she doesn't need and use but It doesn't feel right for me to pack her stuff and let her get away with no responsibility. plus we have to move a lot of stuff to a storage unit until I find a place. We have a lot of portraits and pictures that idk what to do with them and idk If I should let her decide what to do with all that. should I just do this by myself?
Going crazy.... Its been 5 day with NC initiated by me, and since yesterday she hasn't contact me either, and I haven't seen her either, last night I was starting to dream about her but out of no where I replaced it with a dream about a room full of puppies lol, weird. This morning I was having breakfast with my D2 I see someone approaching the house and I got exited thinking that it was her, and it was just a lady leaving restaurants menus on the door knob.. crazy.
Thanks matt I know, Its funny I was way better the first two weeks after the BD its now two months and two days and instead of getting better Im getting worst. and now that im two weeks I move into my sister air mattress Ill be way worst than now... I guess its normal. she just texted me asking about D2 and to make sure I took the food she left for her of if I was going to make food for her. I just answered like this "she is fine" and yes I grabbed the food like always" which is a lie cuz yesterday I forgot I guess thats why she is asking.
Thanks matt I know, Its funny I was way better the first two weeks after the BD its now two months and two days and instead of getting better Im getting worst. and now that im two weeks I move into my sister air mattress Ill be way worst than now... I guess its normal.
That's why the GAL part is so important. Who cares what you're sleeping on if you're content with your life?
Originally Posted By: desp13
She just texted me asking about D2 and to make sure I took the food she left for her of if I was going to make food for her. I just answered like this "she is fine" and yes I grabbed the food like always" which is a lie cuz yesterday I forgot I guess thats why she is asking.
Why add this part? 1) it sounds super passive aggressive - like you think she doesn't think you can take care of your D. 2) you FORGOT. YESTERDAY.
Its funny I was way better the first two weeks after the BD its now two months and two days and instead of getting better Im getting worst.
If you're getting worse from BD than that might not be a good thing. However, we all experience ups and down going through this, riding the roller coaster, so it is normal to some degree.
Someone on here once compared it to using a yo-yo walking up the stairs. You will have ups and downs(yo-yo) but as long as the consistent movement is upwards(upstairs) over time you are moving in the right direction.
Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be
tbh I did mean it that way., I see it wasnt the rigth call... [censored] I keep messing up.. but after that I wrote her "thanks for reminding me though". then she is asking me more stuff about my D2. I guess today she feels like texting me since usually it ends at "she is fine"
Its funny I was way better the first two weeks after the BD its now two months and two days and instead of getting better Im getting worst.
If you're getting worse from BD than that might not be a good thing. However, we all experience ups and down going through this, riding the roller coaster, so it is normal to some degree.
Someone on here once compared it to using a yo-yo walking up the stairs. You will have ups and downs(yo-yo) but as long as the consistent movement is upwards(upstairs) over time you are moving in the right direction.
well its more like when I have my bad days they just hit me harder than before but I am content with rest of things that are going on in my life the stuff that I complaint about has become something to be grateful for. Im trying this new thing that I saw on a ted talk. everyday when I wake up I say three things that Im grateful for and everyday I come up with different things, so even though my M its not one of them at this point there are other great things that I have in my life. but I know I will be adding my M one day.
Before I do anything stupid I need to run this through u guys.. As I mentioned I told her that she should start packing this weekend, in my opinion it will be better to start tomorrow since Im off, but unfortunately she is not, should I tell her that I think she should come over tomorrow after work to start doing this thing? Im thinking to send her this text. " hey Im off tomorrow so I think It would be go to start packing tomorrow, I know u must be tired since its friday, but we don't have that much time anymore."
anything that I should add or change or remove?
second thing once she is here how should I act what should I avoid doing, I know obviously no R talk, no perusing or trying to fix things, but anything else maybe something specific.?
Third thing is that I usually work the night shift 3 days a week so I get home around 1am and those 3 days I pick up my D2 at my W house at 6:10 am so I don't get much sleep, I was thinking in asking her if she could drop my D2 off tomorrow before she goes to work, I know she wont like the Idea cuz they're in opposites way, but Im kind of exhausted. the things that I see bad about this its 1) I have to initiate contact 2) ask her for a favor 3) must likely it will get her mad 4) if she says no or sends her mom to do it, it will get me very mad.
