Heavy, I want to stay busy. I start a new job 7/13. The start date can't come soon enough. Too much time on my hands, and not enough motivation to make myself do much of anything else...
Me: 46 Her: 41 M: 5.5 yrs / S: 20, 18 3/26 W and I meet OW BD: 5/2/2015, she takes off ring W goes to stay with OW 6/26 NC: 9/5 Both moved out: 10/16 I take off my ring and feel... healed: 10/19
Yes, I'm struggling with this at the moment too. I always thought if I had a tragedy I'd throw myself into work and get through it. So much harder than I ever imagined. I can't focus. Work is suffering. Things are not good. I'm hoping that my attempts at GAL will help, but it's a struggle.
Me: early 30s Her: same M: 5+yrs T:10+yrs D (2): under 10s OM PA - Began Apr/15 A Discovered/ILYBINILWY: Start of May Removed ring: End of June
T33 - it blows, my work suffered too, everything does, its just the nature of being a LBS I am afraid. It's devastating in every sense. But,,, hold on, work on you, take your time. Become the better person. You can do it.
Why are MLC'ers so durn secretive? Dang. As usual I don't get it and am slightly amused.
My STBXW guards her calendar like it's Fort Knoxx and has "private appointment" blocks all over it. OK. She guards her phone too like it has nuclear codes on it. Not that I try to snoop, but I did happen to notice it the other day. Of course I did not mention it, none of my business, and I respect that. I know about the OW, I know about all of it, but still she feels the need to hide it.
For me, I've grown more open to "Yeah, my Mom is coming into town and we are going to take the kids to XX." It's like we are moving in opposite circles, I am more open about what I am doing - I have nothing to hide, never did. My life has pretty much been an open book. Yes, there are parts of it that I am not particlarly proud of but for the vast majority of it, it's open.
She lives in super top secret mode as if anyone (I guess me) knows what she is up to the world may blow up. Oh the high drama of this is amusing.
Happy July 4th to all - I am taking a family Vacation for 2 whole weeks! Wow! Off to the airport to pick up Mom and brother to start our vacation.
I was a world champ Smartphone hogger! Yep, you'd have to pry us from the smartphone with a Jaws clipper.
Why we are so secretive? Because we feel that the world is against us and judging us all the time. Plus we feel very much aligned with the OW who "understands" us and don't want you to snoop into our private convos.
Also, because she is at least a bit ashamed deep down? It is sort of like the teenager who has done something they know is wrong and then gives themselves away because they come in all angry and aggressive and defensive when you had no idea that something happened. They know at some level that what they did was wrong, but it is your fault they are feeling bad about it and they are not going to give in to your tyranny.
I assume you've read the MLC for dummies. I will lie and deceive you, but be really inept at it so that you know I'm lying and deceiving you but can't prove exactly what I'm lying and deceiving you about so that you go extra crazy.
Me: 50 W:43 S6, S3 M: 12 yrs. T: 17 M is bad & Not happy Bomb Mar '14 S 5 Feb '15 D Bomb 13 Apr '15 (but "no hurry") DB Coach May '15 Wants proceed on D Aug '15 Starting 1-on-1 negotiations Sept '15
Busy day - out all day long - parades - museum- and next week off from work.
Stbxw and I texted about kid issues - but they are a little more friendly. At each interaction - I say thanks and I appreciate it etc... I am even signing my name - even though she never uses mine or hers.
No updates to report - just more of the same. We are on two weeks vacation - without my W of course. She did text "Did you make it there safely?" I replied "Yes, thanks".
No talking other than when can I call the kids? We will text a time and I make the calls and they talk. Sometimes they will SKYPE. I don talk to her at all nor does she ask to talk to me either.
It's just sad. No news from lawyer this week. It's just more of the same. Sit and spin.
I have wanted to call or reach out to her about a hundred times a day but obviously don't. This is a bittersweet vacation as of course everything reminds me of our last trip here.
It really is hard to believe that our last visit here was so amazing and less than a year later here we are.
Yep, you'd have to pry us from the smartphone with a Jaws clipper.