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I'm very happy to read that all of you like the counselor and she's validating and offering support to you. This is a huge step and one that needed to be taken. Fear has been a part of your life for a very long time and now that you have a better understanding of what it had done to you and your girls, you can begin to break free of it. Yes, it will take some time, but you can do it.

I'm also happy to read that the publisher sent down some kudos to you. You needed this recognition because you've been worried sick about your performance. Now that you know he's happy w/your work, continue to strive for the extra work, but don't stress yourself too much if it's not doable right now. Continue to focus on the paper at hand and you will get the hang of it and then you won't be there at all hours of the night working on it. It will get easier.

Heather, your attitude after the counseling session is the best it's been since you began this journey. I do hope that you don't allow that fear to creep back in. You've accomplished a lot in your life and you've had many struggles and hardships along the way. Your new life began the day you drove away from Ohio and you can visit the past and remember the good times, but focus on the present. It's a gift of hope and adventure and one that has to be lived each and every day. The past is now history and the new chapter in your life has been a blank sheet and only you can write the words on the blank page. Stay positive because I think the new year is going to be an awesome one for you and the girls.

You have nothing to fear, but fear itself. Stay strong, stay positive and the world will embrace you and help you along the way.

Looks more like a rat than a dog.

We have a dog. An actual dog who likes to roll in raccoon poop and eat garbage.

He chose a rat. Ok. That's how I'm going to approach this from now on. He chose a rat. He can have his rat.

I have the amazing choc lab who retrieves tree branches the size of old oaks. She has actually carried firewood for me in her jaws. Firewood that hasn't been split. Big a$$ logs that would squish a rat.

My choc lab spits on little rat dogs owned by skanky-a$$ skanks.

Yeah, I saw the dog, but opted not to say anything. I can't believe the house sold for that amount of money. It is worth far more than that. A place like that would sell here for no less than $400,000. There's nothing wrong w/the home except some spackling, paint and some new carpeting. Most of the issues are DIY projects. What a shame.

Don't worry about the house, it's one less thing you have to worry about now. On to bigger and better things.

I worked hard on that house. I leave it with lots of love.

Remind me AGAIN that she doesn't matter. She is nothing to me and is only valuable in that she cleaned up my garbage, literally.

With her rat dog.

It would KILL D12 and D20 to know that dog was in our house. Kill D12. It's yet another illustration that he is completely devoid any empathy or will to do the right thing. If it's easier for him, that's what he will do.

Ok. Moving on.

Just keep swimming. Making a list of what needs done today.

Trying to decide what's next on the agenda.

Heather,
She's absolutely nothing to you and the dog, well, it's just a dog. Look at it this way, you may have had the best part of him while married, but she got the tarnished, used up parts of him. So, I wouldn't put too much effort in thinking about them...they aren't worth it. Just be glad the house is sold and I would suggest that you make sure it sold for the dollar amount you were told and he's not keeping some of the funds back from you. I don't just him when it comes to money.

Enjoy your day. It's a new one w/fresh adventures.

Thank you Job. Don't know where I would be without your support.

For today, I'm working from home. I told D12 that we could do something fun later.

I started worked, seriously, on the D stuff. I'm putting it together.

I will simply handle the Lunch Menus for the paper and the D stuff. I will start there.

With the D, I'm going to start with the facts. Let's stick to the facts. I have tons and tons of expenses/receipts for the courts.