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Oh, daring, sending prayers for you, your mom, and everyone in your family.

((((Hugs))))

I'm sorry about your mom, Daring. Sending you positive thoughts!

I am keeping your mother in my thoughts and prayers.

Hi Daring,

My father suffered the same thing a couple years ago. They kept trying to treat him for a sinus infection because of the headaches. We finally disregarded the regular doctor and went to emergency room. They took CAT scans and found blood on both sides of the brain and transferred him to a hospital that was better prepared to deal with it. Even there they were unwilling to do what was needed. They even contemplated sending him home hoping it would go away. My father continued to become more delusional. He could not even hold himself up in bed, but would slip and slide all over the hospital bed. We finally got the doctors to insert drains in his head. He has come back a lot, but there are still things that may never recover.

What we learned is that as you age you brain actually shrinks. When you are elderly, sometimes even sitting down in a chair hard can cause bleeding. You may never actually know the cause of this. We never did.

Make sure your family stays on top of the doctors and don't hesitate to push them if you think they are not being aggressive enough in treating your mother.

I will be think of you and your mother as you go through this. Have hope. Ask me questions about my experience dealing with this if you need to.

Being in the medical field, I'm certain you will see that Mom is cared for properly. I'm thinking of you and sending positive thoughts your way...

Prayers going out to your Mother daring

Thanks everyone for your thoughts and prayers- and LT thanks for sharing your experience. I'm definitely monitoring her status even though it's from afar right now. No dilation in the ventricles so she doesn't need a shunt at this point. They are doing daily imaging.

So H checked in this morning to see if I needed anything from store ( hasn't done that in months) and to ask how my mom is. I asked if he was coming by after store and he said- I'd like to. I said that's fine. ( again hadn't done in months- lately it's just been a brief exchange of kids). He may be having a hard time as the weekends he doesn't have the kids he's usually traveling. Prob hard to be home and no kids.
So he came over and we were talking a little about how I might have to get my mom in to rehab and/or move her in with me for a bit with home nursing care. We talked about converting S8s room ( I had already thought about all of this). He said we could put S8 in S19s room. I said what about when he comes home on breaks? H said " he can stay with me".
Not that I'm not expecting this situation to go on for awhile or even forever, but for some reason that statement made me very sad. I feel like I just can't deal with anymore loss or responsibility. I got up and walked in the kitchen and cried a bit. H followed me and said- I didn't mean to overstep my bounds. I said you didn't at all, I've already thought through it, it's just too much right now.

So then he got to working on moving my old dining set out into the garage ( had to be taken apart so was a bit of work). I didn't ask him to at all- he just did. Also seemed to withdraw some and the when the Christmas tree was delivered he seemed bothered ( wistful- maybe??? I know- no mind reading Daring!). He was very impressed with my job on putting the lights up- which is usually his job.
After finishing up table he was moody. I asked if he was ok- said yes thinks he's just tired and grumpy, needs to go take a nap. He's still spinning, but I think maybe he is starting to think.

Daring, so sorry about your Mom. I’m sending positive thoughts your way.

I’ve got a lot on your plate right now. Your H seems to be one of these nicer, but slower MLCers. I can relate. Take care of yourself.

Thanks Bright- I do feel like I have a lot on my plate. Trying to take one day at a time.
My lawyer changed my tax hearing to next week without my even asking, once I told him about my mom. So helpful!
I'm off to see her now a day earlier than I would have been. H offered to take me to the airport ( at the crack of dawn no less!). I get the feeling that he wants to be helpful and be a friend for me in this so I'm letting him in a little bit. I accepted the ride as well as chatted with him when he called last night to check on me.
I don't even have the energy right now to worry about status with our M, which is probably good.
Will catch up on everyone's sitch soon- I'm sure I'll have lots of down time in the hospital room.....

Hi all in DB land- I haven't posted much but have been keeping up with everyone.

Mom is doing better than anyone expected- she has no motor deficits- just cognitive. Her short term memory is poor right now and she keeps going back to old memories ( such as asking where her mom is- she passed away over 20 years ago). I'm able to redirect her memories though and she retains some.
Hoping to get her back to TX where we live ( this happened in MD while visiting family) in the next few days. Will go to rehab for several weeks and then might even be able to resume independent living. God is good!

H has been very supportive- checks in on me and tries to keep me positive when I'm worried. I asked him to send me more of my blood pressure medicine since I might have to stay a few extra days and he said no problem will Fedex.
He said today I sounded good and positive- I told him I snuck out at lunch for a massage as I was feeling stressed and irritable. He said good- massage or sex- whatever works. ( he hasnt joked or flirted with me in a couple of months but has been more recently). I said I don't have the sex option right now- he said you're a girl you always have that option. I said ok yes but I'm choosing not to exercise it.
He laughed. His voice and communication seems different- more like old H. He also has a few job interviews next week.
I'm not making any assumptions about him- just enjoying the more relaxed communication.