Uppercut, my marriage wasn't saved but that's a loooooooooooong story. I wish you the best and hope your wife realizes her mistakes
Me: 35 husband:39 Sons 16 and 11 from my first marriage Twins 5 (boy/girl) Daughter 3 Affair bomb 2/27/14 He moved in with ow 3/13/14 OW kicked him out 6/15/14 4/2016 he seeks help for sexual addiction
"its just making me feel more and more guilty and selfish and withdrawn from UpperCut"
Let's not overlook that. That's powerful.
Me 47 - W 35 M 9 - T 10 2 Daughters - 7 & 9 Discovery of EA- 8/4/14 S - 8/5/15 D mentioned - 9/11/14 R & Piecing - 3/17/15 Regard one another as more important than yourselves. - Philippians 2:3
Jefe, your using DB as a weapon! Something about your attitude and posts strike a nerve with me. I can't put my finger on it but do you think that maybe your wife feels it too and maybe that's hurting your situation?
I am not trying to be negative or mean but I am not going to sugar coat it because that's not my style... (To me) you come across as self righteous, arrogant and condescending. You seem to want to punish your wife with guilt for leaving a marriage that wasn't happy.
Yes, the affair is WRONG but as Starsky once said, he was able to forgive because he made mistakes too and it wasn't for him to judge whose mistakes were worse.
I am rambling now but I just wanted to give you my point of view..... fwiw
Me: 35 husband:39 Sons 16 and 11 from my first marriage Twins 5 (boy/girl) Daughter 3 Affair bomb 2/27/14 He moved in with ow 3/13/14 OW kicked him out 6/15/14 4/2016 he seeks help for sexual addiction
Twin, then you haven't been reading my situation fully.
You have no idea the guilt, pain, remorse, and repentance for what *I* have done to my wife and my marriage, Twin.
I am open to your criticism and suggestions, all I ask is that you please move it to my thread.
Me 47 - W 35 M 9 - T 10 2 Daughters - 7 & 9 Discovery of EA- 8/4/14 S - 8/5/15 D mentioned - 9/11/14 R & Piecing - 3/17/15 Regard one another as more important than yourselves. - Philippians 2:3