I did all the wrong things. Begging, getting emotional, trying to court her by buying her things or taking or places. I did the Love Dare twice which is all about service and showing love.
Me: 36 W: 36 D: 14 T: 18 (05/1997) M: 16 (05/1999) BD: 7/23/15 Separation 01/2015 D mentioned and started 02/2015 D filed 3/2015 OM confirmed 3/30/15
Today started off a bit confusing. At 5:30 my wife texted me saying her heat pumps aren't working and the house is 59 degrees. I told her I will go over and look at it after I drop our D off at school. Then I will call the builder to have the HVAC guy come back out since the house is only 2 months old. She thanked me for that. Then she texted me back saying she needs to start doing things on her own that it's not fair to me to have to handle it. I said either way is fine, I am available to get it squared away. Keep in mind she is a dentist who is going to have to cancel patients and lose money to meet the guy. Right now she is paying all of our bills, so I did not think helping her was a big deal. She then asked me for the builders number and said she needs to learn to be able to handle these things on her own. So I texted her the number and thats where things are left.
Me: 36 W: 36 D: 14 T: 18 (05/1997) M: 16 (05/1999) BD: 7/23/15 Separation 01/2015 D mentioned and started 02/2015 D filed 3/2015 OM confirmed 3/30/15
The Love Dare is probably the worst thing you could have done. Describe more in detail what happened in those months. We're you fighting? If so, about what? What did she talk about etc.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
Well that is great considering I did it twice all the way through. In those months we did fight and we had some ok times. We did not leave each others sides at all. But there was a lot of tension because she was always saying we need to temporarily separate when the house is done. There was also tension about having two mortgages which was not necessary because I had all the finances set up in case that happened.
Well on January 2nd she moved out. We did everything together for the first two weeks and kept everything a secret from everyone. We saw each other 4 or 5 times a day and had dinner together at night. Now that I look back I made the mistake of asking her if she missed me all the time and saying I missed her, she always did say yes though. Every week after that we saw each other less and less. Then when watching the Super Bowl I asked her if she would go out on Valentines Day with me. She said yes and was excited the entire first week. Then when it started to get close I could see she was getting nervous. But she still went. We had a great time eating, talking, slow dancing together. I then took her to her house and dropped her off no kiss or anything. That was the last time she told me she loved me or anything. I don't think we have hung out since then either. She said when she looked in my eyes she saw how badly I wanted us to be together again, that we can't continue hanging out so much.
Now she goes out when she wants with out communicating, which is something she always did before.
Me: 36 W: 36 D: 14 T: 18 (05/1997) M: 16 (05/1999) BD: 7/23/15 Separation 01/2015 D mentioned and started 02/2015 D filed 3/2015 OM confirmed 3/30/15
In that time period I did a lot of crying, begging, bullying, and controlling. Anything you weren't suppose to do I did. I was also doing the Love Dare, so I was not respecting the space she was asking for.
Me: 36 W: 36 D: 14 T: 18 (05/1997) M: 16 (05/1999) BD: 7/23/15 Separation 01/2015 D mentioned and started 02/2015 D filed 3/2015 OM confirmed 3/30/15
In that time period I did a lot of crying, begging, bullying, and controlling. Anything you weren't suppose to do I did. I was also doing the Love Dare, so I was not respecting the space she was asking for.
I too did the Love Dare in December/January. Might work with a spouse who is receptive, but it just pisses off WAS.
Me: 38 W: 32 S10 D6 T: 10 (02/2004) M: 7 (12/2007) Separation 02/2015 OM confirmed 01/2015, D mentioned 12/2014 D finalized 9/2016
I also did Love Dare. I did see some things that worked, but I also felt like I was just being strung along when I kept getting lied to. I decided if things work out later on that I will do it again one day. But now is not the time. It did help my relationship with God.
Me:44 EXW 44 Wonderful Children M11, T14 BD 6/14 OM Confirmed Divorce Final 2/25/16 "It works if you work it!"
I am still not positive she is having an affair. I know there are some signs that point that way but she was raised in an abusive household. Her dad was an alcoholic and her mom was extremely possessive of her and never let her do anything. When we met and started dating her parents hated me and would do anything to keep us apart. Well she choose me and they threw her out only to never talk to her again. As the years went on I now see that I was always trying to control her as well. I do not know if W found someone else and is having an affair or is really doing what she says she is and that is just hanging out with girlfriends because she was never able to.
Me: 36 W: 36 D: 14 T: 18 (05/1997) M: 16 (05/1999) BD: 7/23/15 Separation 01/2015 D mentioned and started 02/2015 D filed 3/2015 OM confirmed 3/30/15