Freaking out a bit now that not hugging or kissing him goodbye has left him with the impression that I just want to be his friend and not his wife and that I don't want to salvage the relationship because I don't care enough to initiate a hug or kiss.
Breathe, breathe, breathe...
Must trust the collective wisdom of the wonderful forum people over my own internal craziness.
I can't control how he feels.
Going to do some dishes to calm down.
That is not the impression you gave. You gave the impression of detachment, which will leave him wondering IF he is the one 100% in control anymore.
Me: 42 W: 32 Married 7 years together 8.5 S1: 7 S2:7 Bomb #1: 09-16-13 Recon #1: 11/13 A discovered 04-03-2014 W filed D 05-19-14 but never served me I filed D 12-02-2014 S 05-31-14 Divorced 5-19-16
Meghan im sure if he thinks that he will try to draw you in...let him think that. after a while he will start to freak out and wonder why you don't kiss or hug him, he will get angry..confused...then he will become curious. stay consistant with that. Don't make the mistake I made, I did the same and that's when I got the most hugs from WAW, then I eased up and she hardened again. Go to my thread and read all that sandi2 posted for me, great info on indifference.
Me: 42 W: 39 D: 2 age 6 and 9 D-Day: Dec 29 13 Seperated: 3/20/14 Mediation retainer : 5/20/14 She filed: 06/25/14
Also... He could have hugged and kissed you. That was an option he chose not to take. So don't keep pointing the finger of blame at yourself. He has some responsibilities in your marriage too, and he's dumping them and not even being subtle about it.
I did the whole self-blame thing for a while too. it is the mark of a fixer. You can't fix him and he doesn't want you to, so maybe you should investigate what it feels like to put that aside for a while.
Take these couple of weeks to investigate what you want and need. Listen to the good advice you're getting. You're in the right place here.
Me42, H40 D12, S8, S7 A revealed: 7/13 Sep 4/14; Agreed to D 1/15
