Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers Need help saving my family - part 10

I don't think that not responding to her at all is a good idea.

As far as holding the financial matters hostage, I'm not sure I have a choice.

Should I go along with what she's saying, sell the house, and then what? I don't know at this point where I'll live. I won't know that until the parenting plan is in place. It's still possible my kids will be brought back to my province.

"thinking"


Got you here......right ???




Respond to the issues at hand....

Kids and bills

Scorp,

You need to get your ducks in a row. First things first...the kids. Then the house and financial matters.

You can respond to W using KISS and STFU principles.

In the meantime, I'd do research on the house value and take a look at housing prices. Keep this information to yourself. You need to be prepared for the possibility that your kids will not be brought back to your province. Work with this mindset. It is what you need to focus on at the moment.

YOU always have a choice.



Why? What is she going to do - hire an attny?

YOU determine how YOU want to respond. Stop being afraid that you may upset her.

I think everyone has said the same thing....Focus on resolving the parenting schedule FIRST!

Has your lawyer communicated anything too you? What is the lawyers plan? Did she give your W's attny a date with which to responded by?

Mach, my L advised me to do what I'm doing as well.

Are you guys saying if my W asks about selling the house that I should just ignore her? I don't see how reiterating my position that we need a parenting plan first before we deal with anything else is a bad thing to do, other than it's going against what my W wants.

I did go along with my W's wishes when she asked to have the house evaluated back in January. We has a couple of realtors provide what they thought the house was worth. My W was puzzled about why I didn't just go ahead and list the house after that was done. I firmly believe we have to have the parenting plan in place first before we do anything else.

It's likely at this point that the kids won't be brought back to my province however it is possible. I do have plans in place for either scenario.

Has she been served yet?

If you really feel you need to respond to that a simple no should suffice.

She understands English. She knows what the word means and anything else she infers from it is up to her.

Eric, I'm not afraid to make my W angry. Treating her how I would like to be treated myself isn't a bad thing. If she asks me a question I'm going to give her an answer.

My L and I spoke again yesterday and the plan now is to have her served, see how she responds and go from there. My L is having her served with D papers which will happen sometime between Friday and early next week, depending on when the process server can get to her town. Depending on my W's response there are further steps I can take with regard to my kids. My L has advised I do not deal with anything else until we have an agreement on our kids.

What changed? I thought that was the plan last week?


Wow, that's gonna be expensive. Certified mail wasn't an option?


Hmmm, where have we heard that before ...

I thought your W was getting served last week?

You may not be "afraid" to make her angry but you seem to still allow your guilt to drive your responses.

How many times have you answered this question? I believe you have already stated your position. Why do you feel the need to continue to have to do it?


Notice that your L did not advise you to respond to every question she has. Yet you still feel the need to.

Please let me remind you....

SHE TOOK YOUR KIDS MONTHS AGO FROM YOU.

And...

You wanna be nice and treat her how she should treat you. Really?

Look dude, I'm all for respect and all, I get that. I am not saying you should wiz off an email that insults her. I am saying that STOP doing things for HER. STOP allowing HER to control every thing you DO.