Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers Spouse tried I didn't, now opposite

MB, I found spouse old username while searching. Not sure if smart to openly put on forum though.

How does this work when both spouses are Dbing and both spouses are detaching at the same time?

What do you mean "both" of you are DBing? I thought you said he gave up. Did you actually read the books? I don't think you fully understand what DBing is.

Should have explained better... My apolohies. Spouse tried and yes trying no more. Spouse still detaching from me so the still dbing comment for them was more in reference to that. I'm still reading when I can but time is so limited with household, work, children, cooking, cleaning, etc. And without help I'm usually exhausted. I will try to be clearer and not get ahead of myself.

I appreciate everyone's input so please excuse my short comments if they don't completely make sense. Breaks at work are few and far between

I know I've been scatter brained and my mind has been all over the place. I truly apologize to those trying to help and keep up. The bad news has me really turned upside down. Dealing with my spouse being "done" and the news of my grandmother's health is tearing me apart. She has survived breast cancer, two brain cancer surgeries and now is in decline. My thoughts are hard and sad and confused

Very little sleep and another hard start at work. Yesterday evening my spouse sat down in our room (my room I guess) and we discussed them leaving and how they no longer have any feelings for me. I listened as best I could and tried to keep my composure. All I could say was I understood and would keep being me and doing what I'm doing so they can move forward with their life to be happy. It's a hard conversation to look the person you love in the eyes and tell them you will survive and you want them happy even though I knew my spouse rejects me and my affection. There was no yelling, no fighting, and no begging on my part and I'm sure that is what they were expecting, but I fought every urge to just be a rock and listen. My gut tells me that the D is coming very soon and I want nothing more than to crawl in a hole by myself and cry uncontrollably. My heart's love transcends the just physical love and affection I have for my spouse. I truly love them so much that their happiness is everything so I will just have to learn to live with my shame and guilt of causing them to leave. My sorrow has never been so great but to know the end is near is devastating. I won't see my counselor or meet with my support group until later in the week so I had to tell somebody.

Did you tell yor S you did not want a D?

Yes Sandi2 I did and the no love for me comment was repeated.

Whytry, watch a documentary called "The secret" it talks about the law of attraction and how it works, basically how if we change our toughs we change our life,take a look at it

Thanks ye21. A lot has just hit me all at once today.