Willbwell, if you are not ready, you not ready. I think you did good! I know it s@cks to be in limbo. Take your time. I’m sure there is something good waiting for you .
M:50 H:52 S28 (my S from previous marriage) M:17 + 3 BD: 06/12 S: 06/12 - H works in another state
Oh Willbwell, just reading your thread and offering my support as you have done for me-so similar in ways to mine. You are doing a great job with kids - it will be its own reward. I don't understand the same things you are struggling with about husband's behavior. I know the anticipation of the D paperwork and financials are incredibly trying emotionally: you did a great job at your meeting. Thank you for sharing, keep up your great work on YOU. It think in the new year you and I both need to make it more about us, less about them.
M 20 yrs me 47 H 51 s11 d8
BD 10/8/13 H Moved out 11/30/13 OW slept over with children Dec '13 OW moved in w/H Jan '14
did my first dance class last night. It was fun. I did a private-had bought on groupon. a lot of people there.group classes going on at same time School is going to be busy this semester. just too s17 to school. his team is going to be on the 5AM news. d15 still sleeping. I have an her to do some HW. have a good day everybody Stay warm
M48 H50 M21 T26 S20 at college),S17,D15-cp, dev. delay- cogniv 5yrs old PA confirmed 7/2012 H separates 9/2012 H move home 2/13& 7/13 lasted 2weeks.ILYNILWY OW still in picture. h filed 10/13
Good job on the talk WBW- sounds like you didn't react and you kept cool. Keep your focus on you. You are doing great.
Thinking of you
TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
You did well with the meeting. This is hard stuff, not only emotionally but trying to figure out and anticipate what your will need for you and your children, especially your D. Group (supervised) homes are enormously expensive but your daughter might be eligble in future for some grants. A good group home can be an tremendous experience for your daughter bringing together a group of people that may otherwise be isolated from friends and activities.
For now, your little chat is over and you did well. Score one for WBW!
back and forth... I am doing for me and kids- my classes, yoga, GAL. today I have an appointment with a financial advisor. I also booked an appointment with my 1st therapist that I used. I quit going to him a year ago because I felt he was too anti-h.
Honestly, this therapist would talk a lot about 'self respect'
What is different today than a year ago? honestly I am doing the same. I do the kids and my classes. oh sure I could say, I am wiser, stronger. I will say my faith is more of a focus than before. I am more kind in general and compassionate. I try and be a less judgemental person.
I don't have time for dating, but once done with my classes and if/when the D becomes final. I will want a partner.
We are D in theory but not on paper. H is still paying the bills. he sees the kids minimally.
I question myself why don't I push forward with D?
I feel perhaps I can't heal completely in this current limbo.
does one ever completely heal??? I will be ok. this I know.
M48 H50 M21 T26 S20 at college),S17,D15-cp, dev. delay- cogniv 5yrs old PA confirmed 7/2012 H separates 9/2012 H move home 2/13& 7/13 lasted 2weeks.ILYNILWY OW still in picture. h filed 10/13
ok, this is weird... there was a voice message on my phone from h's office phone.
it was a portion of a song...
"baby, we're gonna talk it over,talk it over, cause I love you"....
wth? did he dial my # on speaker and his radio just happen to be on? usually I gave D15 the phone to answer anyway.
it is so weird. I am probably over thinking it. But it is sits like this that hinder me from moving on. I heard that and get my hopes up... nope, it wasn't planned. just a coincidence. His phone and speaker are right next to each other...If d would have answered he'd have picked up the phone.
I am going to say to h, that that wasn't nice. please pay better attention.
M48 H50 M21 T26 S20 at college),S17,D15-cp, dev. delay- cogniv 5yrs old PA confirmed 7/2012 H separates 9/2012 H move home 2/13& 7/13 lasted 2weeks.ILYNILWY OW still in picture. h filed 10/13
Smokey called me "Honey" a few months back. I'm sure he was thinking, for a moment, he was talking to OW. It hurt like to hell to realize it meant nothing.
What do you want your next relationship to look like? Who do YOU want to be in this relationship?
I want to be fabulous and active and busy doing things I always dreamed of--hiking in cool places and visiting historic places and camping and stuff like that. I want to be that person I dreamed of being when I was 20.
"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man
“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
ok, not to be smug, but honestly I liked me and who I was/am before BD. I've always been an active , involved person. I have tried to be self aware even before BD. What I would do differently?... Pay better attention. Listen better. Not just assume everything is moving along smoothly just because there is no fighting. I know I can be judgemental. I know I can be a smart aleck. Those are not good attributes. I catch myself now. I should have paid more attention to h and his needs.
I've had a wonderful life. H provided a wonderful life. I know I will still have a wonderful life. would love to have h be a part of it, but if not, I do have faith.
M48 H50 M21 T26 S20 at college),S17,D15-cp, dev. delay- cogniv 5yrs old PA confirmed 7/2012 H separates 9/2012 H move home 2/13& 7/13 lasted 2weeks.ILYNILWY OW still in picture. h filed 10/13
