Good for you honey. Try a collaborative lawyer first. Look up "Collaborative Family Law" first to make sure you understand the difference between that and a litigator. Collaborative Lawyer may seem a little more expensive at first, but they are specialists to work things out between you both much quicker and to save legal costs. Your husband would need to agree to this route though. If not, it would need to be a litigator. Most will give you a free half hour consultation. Collaborative Family lawyers typically do not practice litigation. They are specifically degreed in this area of family law. It can be more amicable as well. Unfortunately my exW refused this route and litigated. She lost....well we all did in the costs, especially the kids.
M17 yrs. me49 xW47 d15 d11
BD1-Jul/11(Affair found out) Therapy 9 months (tried 2) BD2- May/12(sep) Court Jul/13 - I got 50/50 Sold home - Aug/13 Court #2 - Dec/13 Court#3 - Apr/14 ... She lost again We settled.
You and H are not collaborating. H has moved past the point of wanting to feel like a good guy as demonstrated by the GF events. From here forward, he will only get more selfish. Get your own lawyer.
No, I disagree. A collaborative lawyer does not act for both parties. Each party will still need their own lawyer. A collaborative lawyer will only work with another collaborative lawyer. They will not work with a litigator. So your husband would need to agree to get his own collaborative lawyer. This is to avoid the cost of court and litigation. Your collaborative lawyer will work for you to protect you and your rights and get the legal outcome of settlement that is right. Research it. The cost of litigation and court, along with the stress that brings is not worth it to at least see if settlement can be reached without court.
M17 yrs. me49 xW47 d15 d11
BD1-Jul/11(Affair found out) Therapy 9 months (tried 2) BD2- May/12(sep) Court Jul/13 - I got 50/50 Sold home - Aug/13 Court #2 - Dec/13 Court#3 - Apr/14 ... She lost again We settled.
BD1-Jul/11(Affair found out) Therapy 9 months (tried 2) BD2- May/12(sep) Court Jul/13 - I got 50/50 Sold home - Aug/13 Court #2 - Dec/13 Court#3 - Apr/14 ... She lost again We settled.
BD1-Jul/11(Affair found out) Therapy 9 months (tried 2) BD2- May/12(sep) Court Jul/13 - I got 50/50 Sold home - Aug/13 Court #2 - Dec/13 Court#3 - Apr/14 ... She lost again We settled.
Well, I am not detached. Every time I think I'm making headway, another bomb drops. Other woman's two sons also spent the night together with my kids this last time at husband's new apartment. After discussion in which I told him I was frustrated he was still not telling me things regarding my kids before they happened, he replied, "well, I guess I should tell you she's moving in". Now, a month after he move out, he is setting up another family in another house without me - with my kids. I am not feeling detached about this and this whole "be the lighthouse" mentality just seems to be keeping me stuck - he doesn't seem to see the extreme insensitivity/disregard for me in all these things, and yet I'm still having trouble getting past my view of him as someone I could rely on and trust all these years. How do all you do it?
M 20 yrs me 47 H 51 s11 d8
BD 10/8/13 H Moved out 11/30/13 OW slept over with children Dec '13 OW moved in w/H Jan '14
Hey DX...How do we do it? Most of us are still learning to so I hope some experience jumps in with some insight. Seems you exH is forcing a situation on your kids. They may or may not like it so hang tight on that. It may, and probably will work in your favour long term. That's a lot of people in one apartment not to mention your kids have no long term relationship with the other kids. They may find they like each other and be friends, but not necessarily live with them. Your exH and the OM are being irresponsible to their kids and are self-serving. Don't expect courtesies extended your way. Your kids will make a choice....on their own. Just be there for them....always, physically and especially emotionally.
M17 yrs. me49 xW47 d15 d11
BD1-Jul/11(Affair found out) Therapy 9 months (tried 2) BD2- May/12(sep) Court Jul/13 - I got 50/50 Sold home - Aug/13 Court #2 - Dec/13 Court#3 - Apr/14 ... She lost again We settled.
