Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers still hopeful... no matter where life takes me

Julie, there are going to be good days and bad ones on you journey. today started out bad in the wee hours of the morning, but ended up good as I sit here 18 hours later typing to you. what a difference a day makes.

I got my hair cut and took care of some errands I needed. then I bumped into W by accident with D13 and db'd my butt off LOL. now I'm beginning to visualize the things I want to accomplish instead of worrying about W tonight. try to have a good night and let your mind rest.

be good to yourself tonight before you go to sleep. do something you like, eat something you like. Just make yourself happy for a few minutes

Julie-You have taken on so much! I am sorry you had a bad day. I had to laugh about S eating a donut for supper..You are NOT a bad mom!

You are doing the best you can with a crappy situation. You are fighting for your M and protecting your S and SS from so much of this mess. Now a puppy!! I think we somehow knew most of that responsibility would end up on your lap.

You do such a good job of taking things day by day. Do you make an effort to do this or were you not the planner type before?

I am cheering for you and I want you to know that all your hard work is awesome. The LBS has to shoulder so much responsibility. Seems like some days are downright overwhelming. Add to that a H that you cannot even begin to reason with.

I feel for you. I agree with Paul. Take some time for yourself and smile and rest. Your S is so lucky to have such a great mom. Tonight was just a donut kind of night

Paul: I intend to read through and catch up on your story soon. You sound good

Blues you know you are right. I HAVE been taking things day by day and didn't even realize it. I was a huge planning control freak. One of H biggest complaints. I guess after so long of things NOT going according to plan I gave up the pkaybook. Yeah!! More changes are sticking.

Play book.

julie, you're doing great in the midst of a chaotic situation.

Julie-maybe it's getting to be time for us to journal about the positive changes we've made. Before/after. Example: At BD I would cry/scream/beg/plead for H to reconsider Now: No longer do those behaviors and give H space to figure things out on his own. I've had a few things pop in my head about myself and see you've had some recent breakthroughs, too. Heck if our H don't see or acknowledge our positive changes, at least we can

Blues good idea. It will help put things into perspective. I will post later and am looking forward to your list.

Blues - I think that it is a great idea to think about how far you have come. Sometimes we get bogged down thinking about how far we need to go, so it is nice to remind ourselves how far we have really come.

I am done livinv in crazy town. Tonight I am at work and H calls and asks where a particular toy of s is. I didn't know and then he accused me of "doing something to it because that is something I would do."

In reality I have suspected that OW gave this toy to s but I had no proof and I NEVER voiced those suspicion to anyone.

He is going on and on anf I asked if he had been drinking (because he was acting like he was and I was terrified because he was about to go driving with s and I wasn't there to stop him.)

Well that just set him off and he started screaming how sick he was of alwayd accusing hin of drinking. I haven't said a word since BD.

So now I am freaked out about him dtiving and know I have to get him out of the house and have no money for a lawyer. And ni proof he was drinking.

Sorry for all typos on phone at work