Thanks Job. I am wondering if this is really mlc, not that it really mmatters. H is not doing the typical changes, going out, spending money, changing himself. He is basically withdrawing from the world. Work is going non stop 6-7 days a week. Not talking to his friends. While H did constantly. Maybe just trying to hide/bury his feelings? H has also told no one except the guy he's living with about us. When people as anything about us he acts like he's home as normal? That's just so different thank before. H told everyone! Thanks
M15 T19 D13 S13 BD Affair 9/13 S 11/13 D started 6/14.. dropped court date 10/14 H attorney can't get it together. Still with long distance ow. Still hates me.
The basics for the walkaways and the mlcers are pretty much the same. From what I've read of your postings, it does sound a bit like MLC. You have to remember, your h didn't complete his crisis previously and this time around, it just may very well be different and more intense. Time will tell if he's in MLC or not...but you need to give him plenty of space, listen and validate him. He may try to bait you into arguments, but try not to take the bait. If he does bait you, just say "I'm sorry you feel that way" and let it go.
Keep the focus on you and your children.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thanks again. I'm on a mission to happiness whatever the outcome.
M15 T19 D13 S13 BD Affair 9/13 S 11/13 D started 6/14.. dropped court date 10/14 H attorney can't get it together. Still with long distance ow. Still hates me.
I am not sure if I mentioned H started getting depressed this last year. He has applied and tested for a lot!of jobs. H is a medi/firefighter. H really thought he was getting a job in July and didnt. Went to High School reunion started EA with classmate after that. The week before he went he got a notice to interview for a job. 2 weeks later he got the job. After all the tedious process Wi H was about another 2 weeks H found out the city put a freeze on the job....it was then I found out about OW and he wanted a divorce. We had been not getting along a few weeks before his reunion.
H seems to talk to OW when he gets stressed...This was the first that's gone somewhere. Job, I know you mentioned H is angry about breaking it off with OW. I'm sure it's true. H did whoever say many times he had to it wasn't going any where. OW is married and lives 3 hours away. But I'm sure he still blames me...
M15 T19 D13 S13 BD Affair 9/13 S 11/13 D started 6/14.. dropped court date 10/14 H attorney can't get it together. Still with long distance ow. Still hates me.
He may not be actually having a physical affair, but if he is still talking to the ow, he's probably having an emotional affair. It is my understand that emotional affairs are harder to break off.
I would leave him twirling in the wind. Try to keep the focus on you and what you need to do to keep yourself healthy and busy.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Yes, I agree especially when they fulfill emotional needs and feed egos. H says H is not talking to her but??
M15 T19 D13 S13 BD Affair 9/13 S 11/13 D started 6/14.. dropped court date 10/14 H attorney can't get it together. Still with long distance ow. Still hates me.
I got an anonymous text from someone who said my H was still seeing OW. I sent a screen shot and he said he doesn't know who sent it. HE doesn't talk to OW and she would not do that... H showed up to see the kids. I asked him to please let me know when you are coming. H said I told D13. I said it's not her responsibility. You need to call me. H then said he doesn't know who to believe about the text saying I sent it.Really??? H said I can call her but I know it's not her. OW has texted H before from an anonymous number before so I wouldn't know. H accused me of that too and then found out it was her!! I sure hope 2014 is better!!
M15 T19 D13 S13 BD Affair 9/13 S 11/13 D started 6/14.. dropped court date 10/14 H attorney can't get it together. Still with long distance ow. Still hates me.
I think the ow or someone who saw them together sent that to you. Notice how he turned it around and is now pointing the finger at you? Something doesn't smell right and I wouldn't put too much faith in what he's told you. Sit quietly, the answers will come.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I'm sure. I really don't know if H has contact with OW, not that it matters. H said she blocked him about a month ago. I know he hasn't called on his phone. H has a work phone but says he can't use it for personal stuff. Nor sure I believe that either. H said I can call OW and ask her. I said do what you want. I blocked ow so doesn't matter. Just made me mad he basically accused me. Typical though. . I won't bring it up again to him. That way he can't pick a fight with me about....
M15 T19 D13 S13 BD Affair 9/13 S 11/13 D started 6/14.. dropped court date 10/14 H attorney can't get it together. Still with long distance ow. Still hates me.
I was just down in WAS section telling you to move to newcomers, and low and behold you've already taken care of business by moving here. Nice to see you again.
And looks who's posting for you, you got one of the best on the whole site here. Howdy Snod.
First, let me say. HAPPY NEW YEAR to you both. Its going to be a good year, right!!!
