1 other thing if I can add to the above. These 9 months have been hell, but I put her through hell for 5 years. I think I can spare the 9 months. Grace and Mercy, love covers a multitude of sins.
CC, thanks for coming back and posting an update! When I was reading it I looked down at your sig and cringed a little because you've only been S'd two months as of today. Personally I think it's too soon to be bringing another woman into your life. Even if you think you're over your W I doubt you are, it really takes 6 months to a year (or longer) for most people to emotionally stablize after S. During that time there are good times where you think you're fine, but then you'll cycle right back through pain, anger, etc. I think we all have a certain "I'll show THEM!" attitude after BD, we want to get involved with someone quickly to prove we still have value and to maybe cause some jealousy as well. But it doesn't move us forward on our journey which is really what DB'ing is all about. In fact it may slow us down. We've got to learn to be happy in life ALONE first after having been in a codependent R for so long, THEN we may be ready to introduce someone new into our life.
Anyway, I'm not telling you what you're doing is right or wrong, that's for you to decide. I just offer it to hopefully get you to do some thinking about where you are and where you want to go. Regardless of what you do, I wish you the best!
Honestly it's hard for someone to make a "life change" after a couple of months. Getting validation from another woman doesn't usually work. Sure you think she's "great", etc. But then again you thought the same about your W when you first met.
You and your W are pretty young so you probably may not believe anything we say. But that's for you to decide.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
