What do you mean me expecting it every day would be the same, while wanting it every day is not?
That she expects you to not have sex, is selfish
If you expected to have it everyday, it would be selfish. There is a difference between wanting and expecting.
Quote:
I like your attitude though! I wish my wife had your attitude about working on the sex problem.
Yeah, well I've done a lot of research and experimenting and I wish my H. would come out of his tunnel far enough to allow me to show him how much I've worked on myself...
Between working out, losing weight, and research, I'm so frustrated at present.
I want so badly to seduce him, but I have to wait for him to figure things out first. :C
Formerly Workinprogress H :55 M :over 29 yrs. Together : 33 D : college D : adult BD and left : May 2013 Separated Experimenting/Replay
If you expected to have it everyday, it would be selfish. There is a difference between wanting and expecting.
Yes, the frequency thing has been a sore point for most of our marriage. I've always chafed at the advice that quality is more important than quantity. Sure, that's the kind of advice a LD person would give. Just like me telling you that you should be happy with one quality meal every couple of days, rather than three a day. I never understood people who were happy with sex just once a week. How can you not want sex on days 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6, and then suddenly you want sex on day 7? Like is that your refractory period, that you're suddenly interested in sex again on day 7?! And if you like various different positions, or role play, you're going to get just 4 shots at it in a month? So maybe you get around to a particular type of role play or fun just once every few months, or just a few times a year. That's just depressing.
Sure I could compromise to some degree. But if, say, it was just once a week, the reality is that 90% of the sex I'd have would be solo. So, most of the time it's like being back to not having a partnered relationship. Or do you think having solo sex once or twice a day is selfish too?!
Quote:
I want so badly to seduce him, but I have to wait for him to figure things out first. :C
Wow, how different we are! That's so hard for me to understand that I don't know what advice to give you. Figure things out? My reaction is, that's hilarious. What is there to figure out? I've been easy to seduce almost every moment of my adult life. A hand under my shirt, a kiss, a hand down my pants, a crotch grab, my wife wearing something revealing, or a hundred other things, and that's all it takes for me.
So, of course, my wife is very careful not to do any of those things, lest I get the wrong idea.