I don't need my H to be happy. But I want him. I want him to want me. I do need hugs. I get a lot of physical affection from other people but it doesn't replace being held in your husband's arms.
RL I would think every person on this board could have written that. What we are trying to do in our posts is to move the focus on from looking back like Lot's wife at what was, and forward to you living your life as happily as possible in the present circumstances.
You are still kicking against what is, the way you want your husband to be. But, honey, he isn't that way right now, and all the fretting in the world will not change it.
Wow girls frown wow. I am trying to imagine this. When I touch him, does he feel like I would if a homeless varmint riddled vomit covered bum touched me? Is that what you mean? Skeeved out. Disgusted.
I can't say how your h feels but they do recoil at our touch at times.
I highly doubt it's a feeling of vomit, but to them it is unwelcome.
Come on Linda, I know you know this!
Your a smart strong woman, and I do understand you pain and anger.
I only wish you a positive outcome on your journey thru all of this!
The past can't be ahead of you in the future. You don't have to figure it all out, just pick a direction. What's next...I don't know but I can't wait!
The reason why I am advocating for a sprinkling of WOA and now AOS is that, as you say, H is a "kitten" compared to the 'cruel' male MCLers as shown on this board in other threads. And H does not recoil from your touches.
The key for WOA is to be used sparingly and truly genuine. Not just for the sake of it. Like wise for AOS.
As for H possibly initiating R talk when he returns from Russia, it may or may not happen. Try not to think too far ahead. I know it [censored] that he's flying out the same day you're having surgery. It is the time for you to surround yourself with loved ones who support you and make you feel good.
It is very good that you're going to England soon for it will be a good change of scenery for you and get your mind off from your sitch. Be sure to tuck in a good curry dish! British folks love their curry and there's more curry restaurants in that country outside of India.
