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Joined: Apr 2007
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I know the feeling. In good times I am a night owl and have troublesleeping. With current sitch- forget it. My sleep schedule is way off.


~
MH
Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 310
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kelela Offline OP
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Jusy venting here; I'm having a low day today; the time is almost here that H is moving out very soon I'm really scared to be on my own. I know H means well he told me this morning to go down to the family services and apply for assistants to help me out with grocery he said that i will qualify cause I don't make that much. I know that I still have a long way in my situation I know its going to be a tough road ahead of me but I'm not ready to be separated from my H.


M:42
H:37
M:14yrs
S:13; S:9
Found out PA:8/2012
2nd PA & still w/OW:4/2013
H asked for D:6/2013
H moved out: 8/2013
H & OW moved in together: 8/2013
Joined: Jun 2013
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Vent away K, especially if it helps you feel better.

My H moved out 3 weeks ago - definitely not something I wanted but we've got no choice. They're living in their own private world right now. Some days are good, others not so good. I was worried how my S13 would take it, but he's actually handling it better than I am.

Stay strong for yourself and for your kids.


Both 50
S14
M 16 yrs (his 3rd; my 1st)

ILYBINILWY - 24 Dec 2012
H moved out - 27 Jun 2013
Legally separated - 6 Sep 2013
Closing the door and changing the locks
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Posts: 310
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kelela Offline OP
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I'm sorry to hear that your H had left your family too. I know I have a lot of work ahead of me I just hope that I can move on from all this pain. I need to get off the roller coaster of emotions one day im in a happy place to sad place then confused place and the scared place. I just want to be happy again and have my family back. I know at this time its not possible at all and it may never happen I just hope that one day H will come back to our family. Thank you for letting me vent again.


M:42
H:37
M:14yrs
S:13; S:9
Found out PA:8/2012
2nd PA & still w/OW:4/2013
H asked for D:6/2013
H moved out: 8/2013
H & OW moved in together: 8/2013
Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 2,070
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Posts: 2,070
I'm sorry to hear you had a bad night's sleep, but with your sitch I'm surprised you get any sleep! You're doing really well, keep up the good work smile


H47 me48
T22 M21
S20 - Got high functioning autism
3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her
11/2000 H moves back home
2/4/13 H moves out
H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 12,602
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" I know H means well he told me this morning to go down to the family services and apply for assistants to help me out with grocery"

Seriously? Your H isn't doing it because he cares about you or means well. He's doing it to alleviate his guilt. If he really meant well he wouldn't be texting the OW in front of you. Plus it sounds like he's trying to do it so that he doesn't have to give you any money.

Have you discussed the monetary issue with him? Time to get a L.


M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

RECONCILED AND WISER
Joined: Jun 2013
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Mr bond is right. He asking you to go down to sort it out so he doesn't have to help you both financially or general help. I would go down though and get the assistance you need. That way you don't have to ask him for any help and you can get on with moving forward with or without him smile
I think though getting an L at this stage is a bit too emotional for her at the moment mr bond.
Once he moves out, you can do 180 on him without having to worry about money. As I said before he'll soon realise that the grass is not greener on the other side and he'll be the one who's miserable then! He'll get fed up of the OW once he spends more time with her and starts seeing the bad as well as the good things about her. She will start showing her true colours and start annoying him.
Hopefully when he does get fed up of her and is miserable then hopefully he will want to come back to you. There's no reason you can't have a bit of hope, it's what keeps me going at times smile Be the wife he wants to come back to, be stronger and more independent! You can do it! You've got friends that will help you get through this and don't be afraid of asking for help or be too proud.


H47 me48
T22 M21
S20 - Got high functioning autism
3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her
11/2000 H moves back home
2/4/13 H moves out
H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
Joined: May 2013
Posts: 698
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Joined: May 2013
Posts: 698
I agree w/ Mr Bond. Telling you to go to social services just doesn't seem right....


me: 30 H:30
tgthr:7 m:4
no kids
5 counseling sessions initiated by H as a LR: Oct 2012
long distance marriage b/c of work since Nov 2012
official BD: July 2013
nothing filed
1/1/14 I dropped the rope
Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 2,070
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I agree that he shouldn't have asked you to go, but I would anyway smile


H47 me48
T22 M21
S20 - Got high functioning autism
3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her
11/2000 H moves back home
2/4/13 H moves out
H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
Joined: Jun 2013
Posts: 310
K
kelela Offline OP
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Posts: 310
Yes I have and I will have to see how well I'll do it next month when I take over the bills that I will be in charge of. If I can't make it next month then I'll go to family services. At this time I think that I will be able to but won't know till then.


M:42
H:37
M:14yrs
S:13; S:9
Found out PA:8/2012
2nd PA & still w/OW:4/2013
H asked for D:6/2013
H moved out: 8/2013
H & OW moved in together: 8/2013
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