Divorcebusting.com Forums Divorcebusting.com Archives Surviving the Big D Archives A Little Bit Stronger

Yup. Seems to be going ok, once I sat back and relaxed a bit about how busy he is right now. I will re-evaluate in a couple of months - he says this is a function of his busy season and family stressors (moved last week, caring for his mom, etc), but I will be interested to see if things actually do calm down - or if he's just one of those guys who is always in some kind of turmoil. For now, I am just considering the relationship a science experiment - observe and record. Right now I am experimenting with finding out how long it takes him to contact me when I don't contact him.

(Plus, I am curious to see his new apartment once he gets his furnishings in. I helped him paint the baseboards last week. I'm a little bit worried - my ex was a neat freak, if Mr. Big Lots shows signs of that too, I would be worried!)

NNP -- I wasn't saying you are a WAW. It's just that according to MWD, most guys your age are going to be trying to date women five years younger.

My case, after XW threw me out. Looking back, I shouldn't have left, I should have made her move. But I digress. After XW threw me out she started hanging out with her old best friend and her best friend's motorcycle buddies. There was a guy I thought was perhaps an OP. She said he was just a friend and XW told our daughters in summer of 2010 that not only would she never marry again, she'd never date again.

Now, a little more than a year later she is looking for love. She continues to look for greener grass.

BA, you're right beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and personally I think 5'8" is a good height for a man.

kml I'm glad to hear things are going well.

CTH I understand that most men want to date younger, I don't take it personally. When I am ready to date I hope to find someone who is looking for me I spent too many years married to a man who treated me like I had no value. If there is ever some one else in my life I want to know he wants me and no one else.



Probably more true than not for lots of walk-aways... sad really

NNP,

Is that the real you posting elsewhere or an imposter?

it's me

Today is a milestone. We closed on the last asset from our marriage. Now we own nothing together and there is only a tiny bit of debt remaining in both our names. Should be done with that by March.

Other than that tiny bit of joint debt remaining I am entirely debt free and have been since September. That is such an amazing feeling, I never want to have any debt ever again.

It's hardly worth mentioning but I doubt xh will ever know that feeling. The first thing he did post D was buy a $20K+ motorcycle and he is on his 2nd new vehicle in 6 months. When he pulled up in his latest new truck the only thought that went through my head was thank goodness I am no longer responsible for his debt!!!!! yee haw!

As one of the Real Housewives says "Diamonds aren't a girls best friend... Freedom is!" So true so true

Yeah - debt-free is a good place to be, and it's nice to be in total control of one's finances. I still have a mortgage but am on track to get that paid off before I retire. I'm content to live within my means. And planning to increase those means!

I couldn't agree with you more NNP - being financially free and only responsible for your own obligations is very liberating! Congrats on getting your financial house in order and being rid of his!

BA

Congrats NNP! debt free woohoooo!!

I was almost debt free before I married H. It was good. Now 'we' have debt and 'he' has more debt. The 'we' debt is offset by assets which to me = net worth. I haven't quite decided where self worth fits in and ranks in all of that.