Hi WFM...Thanks for visiting my thread. I've read also your story (although not finish yet) and I can see some similarities in our sitch.
Quote:
one thing to add, I co-own a business with my h too. Makes it very difficult!
Yes! It is indeed extremely difficult seeing/working and at the same time detached. Me and H get along well, when we are at work its purely business/work...but also friendly at all times and yet distant...but in my heart there's always this hope and longing/wishing that it would somehow be more than that.
Me50 H53 S22 M23 2007 1st BD May 2011 2nd BD Aug 2011 Moved out(wants space) Feb 2012 came back (wants to work things out) Sept2012 moved out Oct 2012 found out OW but denies March 2013 Admits OW
Thanks Cadet! I appreciate it! I really like it! It put smile on my face... I will always keep it in mind that I am baking and that it needs a lot of patience to make it well done...it must be a darn good cake....Love love it!!!
Me50 H53 S22 M23 2007 1st BD May 2011 2nd BD Aug 2011 Moved out(wants space) Feb 2012 came back (wants to work things out) Sept2012 moved out Oct 2012 found out OW but denies March 2013 Admits OW
It gets better. Every day you choose to live for yourself, it gets better. I made a decision early on to not wallow in what I have no control over and get busy living life. And I have bad days. We all do. Don't be hard on yourself when you have them.
Thanks Raine! Very well said! Indeed it does get better! Few months ago I could hardly talk to anyone about my sitch without bursting into tears but now I am proud of myself that I can talk openly & without feeling like a victim.
Me50 H53 S22 M23 2007 1st BD May 2011 2nd BD Aug 2011 Moved out(wants space) Feb 2012 came back (wants to work things out) Sept2012 moved out Oct 2012 found out OW but denies March 2013 Admits OW
Lilith !!! That is EXACTLY how I feel. And exactly how my days go too. I just wonder how they are supposed to "miss us" and wonder "how life will be with out us", if we are right there, at their beck & call all the time? What other similarities do we share? How long have you been separated? kids? it would be helpful if you added some details to your signature.
I really like the cake metaphor too. I am trying so hard to not peek & let the cake cook to perfection. I deserve the BEST!!
M:46 H:49 T:20yrs myD:22 H distant summer/12 H sleeping in b'ment: Nov/12 BD: Dec 2/12 asked me begin to move end of Jan/13 moved Jan 7/13 (left my stuff) "agreed" to "working on r" Mar 3/13(lipservice!)
This is a great metaphor, I am going to really thing about what things that I am doing that are "opening the oven door". Brilliant!
Brilliant indeed!!! I will do the same CB !
Me50 H53 S22 M23 2007 1st BD May 2011 2nd BD Aug 2011 Moved out(wants space) Feb 2012 came back (wants to work things out) Sept2012 moved out Oct 2012 found out OW but denies March 2013 Admits OW
Lilith... I have been thinking of you, how are you?
M:46 H:49 T:20yrs myD:22 H distant summer/12 H sleeping in b'ment: Nov/12 BD: Dec 2/12 asked me begin to move end of Jan/13 moved Jan 7/13 (left my stuff) "agreed" to "working on r" Mar 3/13(lipservice!)
Sorry I haven't been here or log in here for awhile. I had a tough week but at the same time GALing myself.
H went on vacation with OW. He asked S to bring him to the airport so I was wondering if S knows already about OW. I didn't ask S about it and he didn't say anything to me either. It's been really a tough week; I had a hard time focusing on myself...our vacation last year and "their vacation" now keeps playing in my mind like a movie all the time. Although my sisters came to my rescue (they visit and spent time with me for few days)but still I can't help myself but think about H & OW together Days before his departure I avoided seeing him so I didn't have to mention about his/their vacation or say goodbye or wish him whatever.... Now I am anxious as to what to say or how I should react when I see him when he is back on Tuesday at work. Isn't it kind of weird to ask how his vacation was; whether he enjoyed it? But isn't it feels awkward too if I just ignore or not say anything about it? Any thoughts/advices is appreciated. Thanks!
Me50 H53 S22 M23 2007 1st BD May 2011 2nd BD Aug 2011 Moved out(wants space) Feb 2012 came back (wants to work things out) Sept2012 moved out Oct 2012 found out OW but denies March 2013 Admits OW
Thanks WFM! 'been quite busy trying to GAL :-) Sorry for not answering, still a lot of reading to catch up. Will get back to you soon! Have a nice weekend!
Me50 H53 S22 M23 2007 1st BD May 2011 2nd BD Aug 2011 Moved out(wants space) Feb 2012 came back (wants to work things out) Sept2012 moved out Oct 2012 found out OW but denies March 2013 Admits OW
I wouldn't talk to him about the OW or vacation. He won't be honest and just looks like you're obsession over it and it will push him further away.
M38,H39 M:16Y BD:8/12 OWDB:11/12 S:11/12-5/13 "Temp" home:6/13 OW dropped:9/13 "I love you":12/13 H ring on:2/14 Depression back:5/15 "I'm done:" 7/15 H moved out: 3/16 H moved back: 12/16 Working on us: 3/17
