Oh and yes H has to pay for all travel costs and he has to fly here to pick them up. They can't travel alone. That is in the paperwork. Wonder how he is going to swing that with no job??
Oh and he has plenty of money to come here fro 2 weeks on a vaca with OW and her 2 kids and our 2 kids. Been to all the theme parks. Bought our son a $200 itouch for his bday with cash. So he has money for what he wants to have money for.
Hmmm....so let's do the math.....at, say, $500 round trip airfare......him coming over and getting the kids and bringing them home versus him coming to visit them - $500 airfare versus $2,000 airfare. Twice a year. That extra $3,000 he's spending could instead go to DOUBLE the child support he's offering.
IF the judge used his previous salary to calculate child support, how much would he have to pay?
I know... Makes no sense to me. He wants the boys to see his family and where he lives but he will have to spend way more money to take them there.
When I did it through one of those calculator things online it said he would have to pay $1000 a month. big difference from $250 Not my fault he quit his job to be with OW.
I am just saying if I didn't have a job I would find one whatever it was to provide for my kids. You would think in year he would be able to come up with some sort of job.
He also lives with his mom so his living expenses aren't the same as mine. I am sure he is paying nothing for a place to live or food, electricity all of that stuff.
In a way this is good for me, he is showing me who he really is.. Not someone that I can count on so why would I want him back?? I feel much better about the place I am in right now. I will take care of my kids with or without his help.
I am not trying to keep the kids from seeing their dad at all. He currently lives in a different country from us. If he was in a different town or even a different state that is one thing. I wish he was here to see them more. I never expected to be a single parent. It is all me 24/7
I totally get that. But you have no say in where he lives.
He is entitled (legally) to a specific amount of time with them...
I was a single mom for a long long time, to two little guys too. It was tough and it was not how I planned it either but it is what it is. And, I am a damn good mom. I made a lot of mistakes but it was never for lack of love and my boys know that no matter what, they can count on me to always try my hardest. They are teenagers now and I am with a great guy. Their dad never paid child support or saw them at all...
it is what it is
I stopped expecting fair a long time ago.
Once you let go of the idea that things aren't fair, you can open yourself up to seeing a lot of other opportunities.
I am sorry that must have been hard on you. Love hearing you are with a great guy now!
I have been trying to let go of my hurt and the idea of what is fair and right. I was suprised how ok I have been this week the boys have been with their dad and OW. I expected to be a wreck but have really enjoyed some time off.
I guess it is what it is, we aren't going to come to an agreement so we will have to see what a judge thinks.
All I can do is be the best mom I can be. No matter what H does I will take care of the boys.
Well my kids are home!! I am sooo happy to have them back. They were very quiet today. Tired and sad. My heart broke for them when H said he had to go. S8 started crying H got weepy and so did I. I cant stand to see my baby so sad makes me crazy.. I let H talk to S and he calmed him down. Then S6 kicked off I took him to H and he wanted to know what was wrong. I said he doesnt want you to leave. H said he didnt want to go. I didnt say anything. What can I say??
H was really crying when he left. I know he loves the boys just sad they arent as important as his OW.
I feel really sad tonight. Not sure why I feel so alone and empty should be thrilled boys are back.. H was back to not looking at me and not talking to me just at me. Guess he is mad I didnt accept his very generous child support offer.
I am feeling really down and sad.. Same thing happened after H's last visit. I guess I just cant believe he can leave all over again. Kids are ok so why am I the sad one?? I felt better last week even knowing he was here with OW. I have no idea what is wrong with me.... I dont see him coming back he is perfectly happy where he is so why am I so sad??? I feel so lonely and I need to get myself in a better place.
H facetimed the boys yesterday from OW house talking with her kids. Guess the cats out the bag whether he will admit it or not. Its almost like I need him to say she is my gf and he just wont. I have no idea why and never will.
Just feeling sorry for myself today and need to stop.
