Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers My Fears in GALing

Just wanna jump in and say I so can relate to the obsessing thing too. My mind would just start thinking about it when I'm free, and I happen to have much free time at the moment. I also messed it up by talking to my H about R and saying that he needed to end his affair....turned out...to be really bad for us. Well, just want to give you some support, I'm trying to figure out what to do with mine... good luck!

Denver,

Thanks but can you expand a little bit more? So is this not a good GAL? This is what happens to be available I can do to tomorrow. I can go with W and kids no problem., but at the same time if I go at my friends house I'll be able to give W some space. But not sure what to do.

Newman

Sorry about the vagueness. I would go to your buddies place. Give your W some space. Let her wonder what you are doing. IMO

To expand even more...

Listen, I was not the greatest at GAL. I FORCED myself to go out and do things that were 'fun'. I did enjoy much of what I did, and I did meet some new people, but much of it was empty. To me, the GAL served two other purposes... it created some mystery about what I was doing... and it helped pass the time (in turn, helping me get through the pain).

Go to your buddies place. Try to have fun and let your problems go for a few hours. You need that to help you preserve your emotional energy.

That's my advice.

No worries Denver. I'm really leaning towards doing the GAL. Good to hear from you.

Btw, that toilet incident with the OM on your sitch-- much respect for you having that control. Thats in my head the way you control yourself, I want to follow that kind of control. That time when I knew the OM was in my State last month, I don't know maybe I would've ended up in jail. But these forum demonstrates the self control including you and others. I have to think about my kids before my actions.

Aprreciate your thoughts Denver.

Newman

LOL... sigh... yeah... a little PTSD from that. HAHA. Sometimes, I find it incredibly funny. Other times, I still want to go track down the f'er and shove his trumpet down his throat.

What I will say is this, we prepare ourselves for as much as we can HERE. We don't know how we will react to ANYTHING until we are actually faced with it.

I guarantee though that had that been in MY house... I would have been in jail.

But then again, I have had a couple of drinks tonight... LOL

Well if he's in your house can't you claim self defense?

I enjoyed your sitch man, most of all it was great your W found her way back. Cheers to that drink Denver !

Newman

Make my day law maybe! Trust me, I'm a lawyer and thought about all of the possibilities. LOL

Cheers Newman! Hang in there! It WILL get better one way or the other. The most important thing is that YOU become a better YOU out of this... I know that is hard to see right now. I do.

I know you're in criminal right? Seems like there's quite a few lawyers on this board.

Thanks I really hope it gets better soon. I'm glad I found support here.

Newman

Yes. Criminal.