Well that didn't take long. I noticed my W *67 a phone number on our home phone # that was on my txt message list. Of course the number was innocent. Amazing how quick she is on my phone after lifting passcode lock. I guess it is the horrible marriage we created. My W also has anxiety issues. (as you can see). I am hoping this openness doesn't cause more harm then good. I'm pretty sure I cleaned up all my venting txt and emails off there. Either way I think it is a step in the right direction for me. If I keep my anxiety under control there is no reason for her not to go through my phone.
Took my S all day today. I coached his basketball team. Movies then arcade. W seemed stressed today and kids butting heads.
I am surprised she left the phone number on our caller id for me to see her checking on me. Maybe she forgot to delete it.
I feel really good inside keeping my phone unlocked.
Part of me wants to ask why she called *67 on of the phone numbers on my phone from our home phone. .
It would certainly open up the topic of our phones and hiding stuff
25 what you think. When I hit redial on our home phone log showered that she did this.
Could ask her why she calling my poker friend from house see what she says? It's obvious she saw txt on my phone and she checking to see if it is OW etc
Part of me wants to ask why she called *67 on of the phone numbers on my phone from our home phone. . It would certainly open up the topic of our phones and hiding stuff 25 what you think. When I hit redial on our home phone log showered that she did this. I think you need to STHU...okay? You two do not communicate well and you are both very defensive. Say NOTHING of it. I think you want to mention it b/c you AGAIN want to make her open her passwords which is you obsessing and trying to control the outcome...again...SIGH...
Besides, Let her check on you for now b/c apparently she has felt betrayed in the past (and she was). Let her discover nothing bad or nasty or whiny.
So let her check and be glad INSIDE that she's finding out that you are working your program and being the best guy you can be. How can that hurt? It can't!
Could ask her why she calling my poker friend from house see what she says? It's obvious she saw txt on my phone and she checking to see if it is OW etc
Seriously? Why do we keep having this conversation???
Say nothing. Be quiet. Do your work and stop wondering why she is doing something or what it is. Stop trying to manipulate everything. Let go...
just work on YOU...You are all you control...and again, please SAY NOTHING about it.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
Um I get the zing B cuz i have trouble not focusing. but seriously I've made progress
Latest drama she don't want any part of helping me get to my surgery tomorrow so I said Fack it and got a cab. She was actually mad because it inconvenienced her
25 thx u for your posts. I'm re reading them again now. Actually no I don't want her to unlock hers. Gives me to much anxiety and temptation. I just would like the txting and hiding of txting to OM to stop or slow. It's beyond annoying and when it's happening almost everyday friend or not an emotional bond is created . I know this because I've done it. Smoke = fire. This is why I personally decided to have zero females in my social life and anyone's that are associated through kids stuff only.
I guess it's better for her to start trusting me that I'm not whining to everyone via txt and doing anything stupid.
My counselor told me he thought my W was snooping to "find a reason for herself to be offended" or excuse to get out . I'm not sure i agree or understand what he is saying . Sometimes I feel he isn't the greatest advice giver but on flip side he has helped me with meditation and breathing 10x
You guys really have helped me start to not obsess. You have to remember there are lots of things that go on in my life that I don't vent about and don't obsess about. If you notice my anxiety posts are usually at 4 am when I wake from sound sleep. Maybe here I need to force myself up and meditate
Mr b has taught me when she does stuff not to react. Keeping kids, cook for myself, do my own laundry and the latest get my own ride to surgery. Don't sweat phone etc.
I'm trying to reprogram myself. The rejection can be hard but slowly I'm getting there
TODAY I went to church with me and my daughter . It was very nice and relaxing. Long overdue. Going to try to be more consistant with this . D loves Sunday school