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good idea chatterbug

Hey folks I'm not a "boozer". Two beers is about my limit during the week. I'd rather drink coffee.

So. Alternatives?

1. Come home
2. Go to someone else's home
3. A movie
4. A meal
5. Church (Sunday morning taken care of)
6. Stay at work late
7. Go running

Any suggestions?

What about meditating or learning a new foreign language or building/painting something?

7 is good. Maybe add in 8. core body work

Unbidden - the painting is a great idea with spring on the way. Thanks.

Time to clear the cobwebs from the house and me.

Night all.

Mac

Ah today is a bit rougher than it has been in a while.

Depression kicking in. Seems a bit like the weather. Two days of sunshine and now gloom.

At least I got a text from her saying mother was making curry tonight and I must enjoy the weekend.

From that I suppose the W won't be home until next week sometime.

I guess the best thing I can do is to listen, stand by her, and be there when she needs me, even if I have to go to hell and back.

Mac

The best thing you can do is get a life... The only way you are going to go to hell and back, is if you allow her to dictate the steps along the way.

(((Hugs)))

Ah damn.

Just had another letter from W lawyers.

I called to ask why. She's saying she wants to move on.

She also says we need to talk and leave the lawyers out of this. L says she wants half of everything.

Ma's upset. W says she's coming back from Franskraal tomorrow for the chat.

I've no idea what to say. I FEEL like saying "you want to be friendly doing this? Forget! I'll fight until the last breath in my body"

There's a fair chance that my L can use my injury to put a stop to the 30 day sell the house instruction.

HELP!!!!

Mac

ah mac, sorry about that.

look , the calmer you are the better you can handle things.

don't spoil all the work you have put into this by getting defiant and fighting with her.

remember - dropping the rope means dropping it. the more you resist the more she will resist.

try to get your lawyer to make any delays that he can come up with

i don't know if this is the right advice, but i can't imagine that staying calm, collected and dignified to the very end couldn't be the right thing to do

if you're not ready for the chat - tell her you have other plans and sorry you can't drop them at the last minute.

if the chat does take place - be nonchalant, keep looking at your watch as if this is utterly boring and taking up your precious time, and what is there so important to talk about that the L's can't deal with - and you really need to get to where you are going , are we done yet? since this was so last minute

don't show her you're hurt, or upset or anything - just that this is not such a big deal.

she's coming for a chat to check out where you are at - if she can push your buttons. don't let her.

you can do this, you know. just act as if..

go meditate - it will help you get grounded:)

take care of yourself first and focus on being in a really good place when she gets there.

zig

Mine said this as well and I will highly advise you not to fall for this (as I did). I thought that by doing it the way he wanted, it would "show" him that I was the better option. That by being agreeable, he would see the light and "wake up." One day I woke up and decided I was better than "just an option," I wanted to be a priority.

I hired a lawyer and cut off all communication with him. Anything he sent via email, text, etc... Was forwarded straight to my lawyer. Even to this day, it is very rare that we speak and my lawyer still gets a copy of all communication (just in case).

As I stated above, the only way you will walk through hell is if you allow her to dictate the steps along the way. Do this the right way, not her way... You may walk the edges of the fire, however, it will keep you from walking straight into the fire.

(((((Hugs))))