Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers In the Land of Confusion, where the WAH pursues...

great job on doing all these things the last few days.

and you reminded me about my yoga class this morning - after the events of last night i had plumb forgotten!!

hope your weekend is going great - and you have a great time with your friends

zig

Nice Job on all your activities! I am happy to say that I am done with all the painting in my home-selling project

One word for you: Behr. Well, Behr paint. I avoided having to prime some very dark walls and now have a beautiful creamy color up.

Thanks for the tip, LIO. I generally use Benjamin Moore because I love the colors and the no-VOC stuff. There was some white globs at the bottom of the can which indicates to me that something was wrong in the mix because the paint was dark blue! Oh well. It was fun while it lasted. I'm definitely going to move back toward the creamy colors if you have any recommendations

Ugh - there WERE some white globs. Post-yoga brain!

Hi verab- you seem like you are in a good place, busy, focused goals and plans made. I feel very happy for you right now and would have loved to see the paint job. Hope you enjoyed yoga and the big bottle of wine with friends!!

Thanks busting, I'm trying. I don't always feel like I'm in a good place.

Last night I had a dream that things were much better between H and I. Waking up I felt really unsettled. We have a little over 60 days before the cooling off period ends. H will be out of town for at least half of that time.

It makes me sad to think that he's not really working on any of his issues. It's sad to think that he feels like he addresses his feeling that his parents didn't love him enough when he was younger (his words) by trying to be this dominant alpha male who turns to relationships with women as his salve. I remember thinking that I'd be able to show him love and that would fix everything (co-D). Wrong.

I learned last night that a co-worker who I don't really get along with is also dealing with a D/MLC with her H. I don't know if it explains much but it was a reminder to be kind, for everyone is facing a hard battle. (Plato).

Good morning vera,

This quote of yours spoke to me this morning and was exactly what I felt and I realized how it fits into co-D, we will do the work for the other person.. wow. Thank you for the insight.

I was on vacation last week and just got caught up on your thread this morning. It sounds like you are going through a transition (his absence due to work) and transitions bring up more feelings... but probably for him as well.

thank you for the insight.

NG I'm glad my rambling was helpful for you You are probably right about the transitioning.

***

I realized today that my LL words of affirmation tank wasn't full enough. I realized it because I was reaching out to a few people to show them some art/projects I'd done recently and felt really good when they comlpimented me afterward. I felt an "oh - that's something I've been missing!" feeling.

Is it odd that WOA is one of my primary LL's and yet for years I was terrible at (and frequently embarrassed by) receiving compliments? So many issues here.

i'm the same way, vera. i think it's because my mother always tried to let me know i was not good enough and not to think i was better than i was. i could count the number of times she complimented me on one hand.

so, i guess i feel embarrassed when i get a compliment and like i don't deserve it but i REALLY need them...

The blanket I'm working on is progressing pretty quickly. I'm confident I'll be able to get it done in time. That feels good.

Got a few gems from my mom via email today. One was:
Oh, mom.

I haven't heard from H at all for about 36 hours. I think that's a new record on his part. I can't say it's not weird. I don't want to say there was an expectation there (based on his pattern of at least 2 contacts per day) but maybe there was.

I'm now about 8-10 episodes ahead in the show we were watching together from the last episode we watched together. Hey - I'm here by myself and I need something to watch while I'm working on this blanket! I'll have to think of a response for when that inevitably comes up in conversation. I guess I'll just go with what I wrote right up there ^^

Tomorrow: haircut! And a few more things on my to-do list.