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jks Offline OP
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25? Are you there?


Me: 32 H: 32
M 9 yrs
#1 D7 #2 S5 #3 D2
Bomb 8/12/11
H moved out 8/14/11
PA started w/H & OW in 1/12 - found out 3/24/12
Got my own place 8/25/12
H & OW move in together 9/15/12
Still married.


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Originally Posted By: jks
25? Are you there?


yes I am.

I'll try to find what I was responding to and answer this weekend if possible. Company arrives in the a.m. though.

Glad you had a great 4th!


M: 57 H: 60
M: 35 yrs
S30,D28,D19
H off to Alaska 2006
Recon 7/07- 8/08
*2016*
X = "ALASKA 2.0"
GROUND HOG DAY
I File D 10/16
OW
DIV 2/26/2018
X marries OW 5/2016

= CLOSURE 4 ME
Embrace the Change
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Just catching up and wanted to say that I'm really happy the two of you are looking to move forward. I would just be careful to manage your expectations. I do think it's fantastic you've found a therapist who is a "right" fit for you!

And I notice such a big difference in your posting you sound so much happier and confident!

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Hi jks, sounds like a wonderful 4 th of July! Happy to hear that.

Just dropping in to say hi.

Have a good Sunday.


TPS
Me: 44 H: 42
M14 T17
S10 D7
10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month
21/04/12 H is 'DONE'
04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010)
July '14 H ends affair
May '15 H moves back home
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jks Offline OP
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H just left with the kids. I am continually happy. Times like these, though, when I see him make me want to just get in the car and go with him. I'm allowed to feel that way, right?

Feels so silly for me to be left behind like this and I wish so much that I could read his mind. He's really good at hiding any type of emotion. Just kinda bummed today. I wasn't expecting anything from him and I knew it was going to be just like it always is. And it was.

Just getting kind of tired of being alone. I know this is normal and it will pass. I'm needing something amazing to do today but what that will be, not sure yet.


Me: 32 H: 32
M 9 yrs
#1 D7 #2 S5 #3 D2
Bomb 8/12/11
H moved out 8/14/11
PA started w/H & OW in 1/12 - found out 3/24/12
Got my own place 8/25/12
H & OW move in together 9/15/12
Still married.


Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 1,711
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Go moose hunting?


Me51 W53 S17 S14
M22 T25
Bomb-9/11; A-11/11; I move out 11/11

It's easy to find our bottom, it is our top that requires cultivation.

Every rough spot adds to our emotional constitution. -Barney Fife
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jks Offline OP
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How's this for amazing... a nap!!

It was very much needed even though it wasn't that glamourous of an activity. Now I'm off to my brother's house to have dinner. Have a good night, all!!


Me: 32 H: 32
M 9 yrs
#1 D7 #2 S5 #3 D2
Bomb 8/12/11
H moved out 8/14/11
PA started w/H & OW in 1/12 - found out 3/24/12
Got my own place 8/25/12
H & OW move in together 9/15/12
Still married.


Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 1,696
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jks, I wanted to wait till 25 had replied before I commented on your day at the farm for the 4th! I'm so glad you had a wonderful time!

Sunday nights have been tough for you.
But I'm glad you got a nap and dinner with your brother.

Thank you ever so much for your kind and supportive words on my thread!
I really needed them!


Me54/H47
'08 H is "done"
March '12 H moved out
Brink of D, December '12
2014 totally reconciled!
......
"I firmly believe in the...absolute possibility of marriage renewal."
Jim Conway
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Enjoy your dinner. Time not thinking about sitch is good time.


M:40
W:28
D:7
Married: 5
Together: 10
Separated: 4/1/2012
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jks Offline OP
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Well, change of plans...

Drove past H's parent's house on my way to my brother's house and guess who's car was there? Yup, OW's. I stopped immediately and went to the house and walked right inside the house and there they were all (meaning his mom, sister, OW and H) sitting on the couch just chatting away. OW's face was pretty priceless.

I just looked at my H and said, can I talk to you? So we went outside and talked for a while and he basically said all the same things he's said before about how his connection with OW will never be like his connection with me but he's still so confused. He just wanted to go to his therapy session tomorrow and lay it all out and get a 3rd party's perspective. He was really looking forward to it because he says he struggles everyday with what to do.

I said, you're already making the decision by continuing to hang out with her and your family. Why is it that when you're trying to figure things out that you have to have her around? You're just making it harder on yourself and harder on her. Maybe try finding your own happiness and finding yourself rather than trying to find it through someone else like you once said to me.

I don't know folks... I mean, really? How much longer can I put up with this? It got so bad during the conversation that I actually FAINTED!! Yup, totally lost it and was completely out of it.

I sat there on his lawn thinking, I have no where to go. He gets to walk right back inside and has OW to comfort him and make him feel better along with his family and I have NO ONE!! The worst feeling in the whole world. The one person I just want to comfort me and be on my side was standing right in front of me saying... I don't know what to say.

More and more I'm seeing a different side to him than I've ever seen. How can I want to be with someone who could care less about what I do? He doesn't appreciate me. His connection is so strong with OW (or so he thinks) and I am not going to compete with that.

I have so much more dignity in myself than I ever did before and although it makes me sick to my stomach to end things. I'm really feeling like we will not progress into anything while he's cake eating and I'm allowing it. OW is not going anywhere and I am the backup. I cannot accept that in a M and will not accept it. I know without a doubt that I will be gone and he will regret all of these decisions he's making. The fact that he's been questioning his decision to continue with her just proves that. But at this point, time for me to move on... it's getting old.

Really having some major thoughts of just filing. There's only so much of this that I can take after he repeatedly tells me that he just wants his family back together. I do not feel bad about going to his house tonight. Their behavior is sooooo inappropriate.


Me: 32 H: 32
M 9 yrs
#1 D7 #2 S5 #3 D2
Bomb 8/12/11
H moved out 8/14/11
PA started w/H & OW in 1/12 - found out 3/24/12
Got my own place 8/25/12
H & OW move in together 9/15/12
Still married.


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