Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers Optimistic...not hopeless! :)

Good heavens, Accuray. I think you are a Godsend.

Wonderful post about feeling replaced, Accuracy, thank you. Love the shoe analogy!

And thank you, HP, for sharing how the OW impacted how you felt about yourself and your M. I recognize those feelings completely. ((( )))

Accuright on the money again. Thanks, I saved this in my helpful words document. It's too bad that we can't "favorite" posts on here!

AMAZING Accuray!

Thanks again!

So, my H sent me his paper work for supposedly refinancing his car. He told me that when 'they' received the title, that obviously my name was on it, so I needed to sign a paper to have my name removed from the title. When I received his paper work in the mail, it has his original car title (we just financed this brand new car 4 months ago), and a piece of paper to sign to get my name off the title.

As far as I know, you only receive a title when your car is actually paid off and not refinanced.

Then, when I refinanced my car, the bank is sending me paper work for my H to sign that has to be notarized in order for him to be removed from the loan and the new title.

I just feel like he is trying to deceive me. I feel as if he did not refinance his car, but actually paid it of...with what money I am not sure...since he had a $20,000 loan out.

Even if he is treating me like a business partner, which is what our relationship technically is right now, because I would not even say he treats me like a friend, you would not lie to a business partner and try to deceive them.

He still has not mentioned a date to pick up his bedroom furniture or things...what is going on with this process?!?!?

I had my chance today to act as if!!! And I think I did a WONDERFUL job!!!

I had to meet my H so he could sign car refi papers for me. I dressed cute, but not too over the top, was nice, smiley, and even joked with him.

I kept it strictly business, had him sign the papers, and then we left the bank. He held the door open and I said "thanks!" I gave him a box of his belongings and scrapbooks that I have made him throughout the years...Marine ones and his military pictures.

I then called him when we left because I had forgotten to tell him something. We talked for like 5 mins on the phone about the house and about him graduating from college last weekend. I said "Congrats!" I said "Well, now off to get your Masters." He said "not yet, at least!" I said "Well, in time." He then said "Yeah when I figure out what I want to do with my life!"

He's still lost...I can tell! He came in wreaking of smoke...apparently he's picked up smoking because his girlfriend also smokes...that part makes me sad.

He said he would be in contact with me about when he'll come to pick up his things. He gave me a day next week, but I was not available so we'll see what other day he comes up with!

I just don't know what my next step is...stay dark?!?!

Yes, if OW is still in the picture then you are doing the best you can do. Good job!

I don't know if this is backsliding or not...

I sent my H an email with a link to a Memorial Day video that one of his friends made and posted on Facebook about one of his buddies that lost his life 2 years ago in Afghanistan.

All I said was that I thought he might like to see the video and that his friend did a great job on it and gave him the link. I said if it didn't work that he could ask his sister to ask one of his other friends to share the link.

I don't expect to hear anything back from him. I was simply sharing it because it was in honor of his friend's death.

Now off to GAL...I've been so busy this looong weekend. I was just laying out with my neighbor...now off to lunch and shopping! I've kept myself VERY busy the past two months, but it still just doesn't feel 'right.' How does it feel so right for him?!?!

Just wanted to say that Accuray's post was fantastic. I have 4 posts book marked and they're all Accuray! LOL Just realized that.

Thank you for putting things in words that make sense to me.

Hoping and praying I feel the same way about second choice with OW. Thank you for sharing. And in think you are doing a fantastic job at GAL and staying dark.

Accuracy if I may-- your insight is amazing. I feel uplifted with everything your write.

Busting