Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers Too Little, Too Late...part 5

P -

Forget about H for now... Focus on this trip and what a great opportunity it presents to take care of yourself.

HAVE A GOOD TIME!!!

Purg,

Have a great trip! Focus on yourself and on today! You can deal with problems when you get back, but now is the time for you to take a time out.

Take care and (((hugs)))!

Have a good trip Purg! I assume you have a phone and I also assume your H has your #. If he needs something he should call. Try not to worry too much about him and focus on yourself.

Best!!

I'm getting more focused on myself and my trip and I finish packing and making playlists for the road. I've also downloaded a few audiobooks, including Laura Munsons' (the one that 25 posted about on barely floating's thread) so it should help to make the trip go by faster.

H did call...at 8:30. He said he had just gotten out of the gym. I don't believe him but it doesn't matter- because he has to live with the fact that it's so easy for him to lie to me.

He said: "So... I don't want to ask to many questions, but what do I need to know about your trip? I mean, if something happens...er, uh.... you don't have to tell me all the details."
{can you see the questions marks over my head??}
I told him where I'm going first and that I will end up at my parents house sometime mid-week. As far as the details in between- I don't have anything set in stone. {This was my attempt to satisfy his question, but keep somethings a mystery.}
H: "Ok, ummm. Any plans for Superbowl?"
{This is where I KNEW he had been talking to his brother!! I didn't want to lie, so I kept things light}: "Yeah, I've been talking to [BIL] about getting together to watch the game. He's got a soccer game that morning and then he's going to a co-worker's for the game. I think I'll go with him, I just don't want to impose on a stranger."
H: "Well, there will be a bunch of people there, like the house parties we used to have. Did he say who was having the party?"
{HOW would he know this- unless he's been talking with his brother about my plans?! Checking up on me already??} Or maybe his brother wanted to keep him in the loop so as not to appear that there's anything 'sketchy' going on.
FOR THE RECORD: BIL lived in the apartment below H & I in college, we have always been friends- even turing to each other for R advice. I've NEVER been attracted to BIL, I only wanted to hang out with some people my age to watch the game- sitting with my MIL on her couch with her boyfriend isn't my idea of fun. I asked H's 'permission' to call BIL about hanging out for the game- he said he was ok with it.
M: "No, he just said it was a co-worker."
H: long silence... "Oh, ok."
{H knows most of BIL co-workers from when they all hung out on New Years... it makes me wonder if there is a certain person that H doesn't want me around... interesting that he would care.} I really wonder if H will keep tabs on me through his brother....wonder????
We talked a little more about what time I'm leaving in the morning and if H is coming to stay here tonight. He said I could just knock on his door when I leave in the morning That kinda bums me out, but I'm hoping this is 'normal' WAS behavior- where they can't act like the care or even notice if we leave??


ok, off to bed so I can get up and leave before my boys get up.... I've already kissed them and put them to bed, I don't want to hear the crying in the morning if they see me leave. It may seem cowardly of me, but I don't want to start my trip in tears.

Good Night DB family, I'll check in with y'all tomorrow night (since trying to post while driving will be VERY difficult!)

wow! sounds like someone is fishing! good job on answering w/out really answering. sort of like when H asked me "oh.. you're going out tonight?".. i wanted to say no. i always wear these fitted jeans w/ flirty top to go to the grocery store. and then later saying.. "have fun.. wherever you're going". i mean, who says that?? wording it to sound like they really just don't care.

you are going to have a great time!!! i'm so excited for you!! will be waiting for your check in!

Purg - (((((hugs from Rick))))...have a great time!!!!!!!

Quick post (as my car is warming up in the 36 degree weather)....

I woke up H to tell him good bye, and he rolled over, said drive safe, and went back to sleep. Wow. Talk about detached.

What he doesn't know: I KNOW that he didn't come home until 5:45 this morning, because my alarm went off at 5:30- and I saw that the bedroom light (which we leave on for one another if we are out late) was still on. So I hit snooze and closed my eyes. H snuck in my room at 5:41, walked over to me and stood over me with his cell phone for a minute, then snuck back out and went to his room. Not sure what that was about. My snooze went off a few minutes later and I got up to start my day.

If he knew I was leaving so early in the morning, why would he stay out the LATEST he's ever stayed before and choose to come home at the time that I would be leaving?!?! Crazy. Normal people would choose to stay in the place that they are expected to be awake- at such an early time in the morning- so they could actually get more sleep.

Like bklyn said: "can't mind read someone who's lost their mind"

Have a great trip, babe! You deserve this time away.

Quick post before I pass out...
So I'll write the whole story tomorrow, but I stopped in my old college town (Jacksonville, FL) to have dinner with a great friend. Well, dinner turned into drinks, which turned into dancing.... And now I'm sleeping on her couch (with a little buzz.)
I like traveling with no specific plans and no kids! This was a fun night

Its strange to be back in town, I haven't been here in 6 years! This town holds some of my greatest memories:
I was born here, moved away when I was 10.
I got my first apartment here after high school
I went to college/graduated here.
Met H at college
Got married here

There are so many places/ buildings that remind me of a great time in my life.... It's comforting and sad at the same time.

I'm off to Orlando tomorrow to catch the game with my BIL!
I hope everyone is having a great weekend- I'm sorry I didn't have a chance to catch up with y'all today.

glad you're having a grand 'ole time! can't wait to hear about tomorrow!