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One of the things that I have learned is that God is the one consistent in our lives no matter what. I have more peace now than I can remember ever having before.

Also, my W has gone back to church since my children have been with her. I am extremely grateful for that.

I'm going to share this link since we are on the subject. It is an amazing story of hope.

Pam's Story



Yeah, it was an innocent mistake. A silly one.



Thank you JB. Your prayers are very much appreciated.

Thanks for chiming in KD. I completely agree with you.

We have to be mindful of what information we share. Once it leaves are lips or email accounts....it is possible to get back to our spouses.

Hi LITB:

Just wanted to check in see how things are going for you.
Hey it is great that the rough waters seem to have calmed down finally.

When i read your first post, i could have easily taken your name out and inserted mine. Our sitch's are very similar. Spouses who feel that they have been betrayed so bad...

Don't worry about the L or D thing. Just do what you are doing well and believe me, things will fall into place.

If someone told me last year that i could be just as happy by myself, i would not have believed them. But now, i can say...Even if the D goes through for me, I will be happier.

Good luck man!

So start concentrating on what you can do to continue the positive interactions with your W. You want it, you're going to have to do the work.

So start concentrating on what you can do to continue the positive interactions with your W. You want it, you're going to have to do the work.

@MyK....great to see you around buddy. Even better to see you doing so well.



Thanks for the advice Bond.

After last week, I had pulled back a bit from communicating with my W.

This morning I had sent an email with the link above, about Tim Tebow to a few friends (my W included). She replied and thanked me for sending her the story and proceeded to tell me that her pastor speaking about Tebow yesterday.

It gave me the opportunity to tell her that I was impressed when she prayed for dinner one evening while I was in NM. My W wasn't a person to pray. We had a pleasant exchange.

Your advice reminded me of what my DB coach told me last year. Look at our spouses as having a Love Bank. We should make 5 positive deposits to 1 negative withdrawal. I believe that was the ratio. I try not to have any negative interaction with her.

LITB, thanks for sharing the link. I think I've read that story before, but I certainly don't reading it again.


^^^ LITB, I'm really glad to hear this. I think the more you can let go and let God, the more peace you will have. If He intends for you to get back together with your W, He will find a way. Just hold up your end of the bargain, and I think you're doing that.

It seems to me your W is conflicted in a way. She has OM, but she's stargoing to church and prayed for dinner. If this is the case, I'd be surprised if there wasn't some sort of implosion on her game plan. but you never know.

Keep up the good work! Keep making those positive deposits.

Thanks for the positive vibes JB.

I'm glad you enjoyed the link. It is an amazing story.

A little update on my sitch(nothing earth shattering):

I have noticed that my W has been reaching out to me more over the course of this week. When I called my kids on Monday evening, she got on the phone between talking to our D8 and our S5. Just chit chat. Nothing of significance.

Yesterday, she called me on the way home from work just to talk.

I'll take those as steps in the right direction.

LITB, I am glad you’re seeing a few baby steps, and it is much better than last year.

I believe in God. I believe we all have a personal relationship with our deity. I also believe we need to do our part. As a child a common phrase in my household was “The lord helps those who help themselves”

To borrow a phrase from Val, and DG’s thread title “Keep on keeping on”

JS....thanks for dropping by. I wholeheartedly agree with the phrase you posted.



Since we are on the subject of God, I wanted to share something from the meditation book I read. Hope it brightens someone's day.

MENDED HEART
The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18

Few people pass through life without feeling the sting of betrayal, the loss of friendship, or the failure of important relationships. At those times, you may feel that the pain of a broken heart will cling to you for the rest of your days and that you will never be whole again. Sometimes you may even wonder if God still loves you.

God does love you, purely, simply, and unconditionally. Even if your pain is the result of your own actions. God’s love does not condemn you. It urges you forward, calling you to forgive yourself, make amends, and become a better person. His love is constant and predictable. And with the assurance of his love comes hope - hope that you will love again, trust again, offer your heart again.

My flesh and my heart faileth; but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion forever. Psalm 73:26

Thank you, God, for the promise of your constant love and the hope it brings to my life. Amen