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Well, weird weird morning. I was sleeping this am -- heard W in shower. I heard her drop the shampoo or one of S's toys or something, didn't think much about it. A few minutes later I got up, walked by and saw W sitting in the tub looking confused. She said she needed my help to get to the bed - she had passed out in the shower.

Apparently what I thought was her dropping some item was her falling down and passing out... WOW. I dried her off, she got dressed and got into bed. I know she hadn't eaten last night -- she said she didn't feel like it, and was kind of nauseated. I know she's been stressed at work also-- and I'm certain our sitch is taking a toll as well. I felt SO bad....I wish she didn't have to go through all of this (I wish WE didn't) and I really wish I could make it easier on all of us.

Then I think-- it's her decision to leave the m, to get involved with OW within a few weeks of our 'breakup-still living together with child' and I get confused. I love her -- I don't want her to hurt. I can't be a martyr and just give up everything I've worked for so she can have it all work out the way she wants it to---whatever that might be I'm not sure.

Am I making any sense? I definitely have never wanted to hurt her --> I take ownership of the things I did that led to our demise, but damn it, seeing her like this just broke my heart for her......

"You know, Rick1963 also is pretty close on our timeline with the bomb...and i've noticed several others on here over the months. I wonder...was it a full moon LOL?"

That was a really crappy couple of weeks for us^^^^^. Too bad I blew up that day on my W. Even tho she had checked out a while back. Me getting pissed that day was the starw that broke the camel's back.

I hope she did not hurt herself. Yes this process will take a mental and physical toll on all of us including/especially the WAS. Most of the LBS who follow DB are in a healthier place, just ask JB. Look how wonderful you are. She is hurting you yet you took care of her. Hang in there

good question, will have to check on that!

What era/area of history do you teach?

IS,
Sorry to hear you had to experience this. No matter what your feelings are toward your s at the moment, seeing them in such a vulnerable postion is difficult. When my w was still living with me, just before she left, I passed by her room and caught her crying on the edge of the bed. I sat down and rubbed her back and hugged her. Even though she had been putting on a strong front about leaving, she confessed that she was having a very difficult time leaving. It broke my heart. Still tear up today when I think about it.

Nothing wrong with being compassionate toward her, you still love her, eventually she will realize that.

so did she get it checked out or what?

I say get a CAT scan and maybe all this MLC WAW stuff will make sense and then they can remove the tumor or alien in her head.

then all will be well.

IN truth, I DID ask my h to get an exam at one point b/c he was SO weird and out of character. What kills me is that he said "I did. And it's not interfering with other things so I'm fine."

Sure wish that bonhead doctor mine spoke to, had called ME and I'd have said "a FEW OTHER THINGS ARE VERY EFFECTED...and very interfered with.

Like my happiness and our kids' lives...

anyhow, let us know.

Hang in there.

Lol 25 you are way funny. Everytime I asked my W to get medical attention for an illness she thinks I'm angry that she is sick?

IS, sorry you had to go through this. I think you did the right thing and the loving thing. I'd say your situation is taking its toll on her, too. She's just not showing that side to you.

IS
I'm sorry sweetie. That must have been extremely scary.

Yes what you said does make sense as does all the responses.

You and your were care about each other. I know it's hard to see that amongst the hurt, anger, selfishness, and the bazillion other feelings... but it's there buried deep.

It effects the both of you. You don't have to validate her choices.. but you can certainly validate some of those feelings.

(((( ))))

So sorry, IS, I know seeing someone you love in pain is difficult, no matter what the circumstances. Sounds like you handled it in a mature, loving way.

I do hope she will get that checked out, that's certainly not something to let slide!

Don't forget to take care of YOU! ((()))

Quick update:

No, she wouldn't get checked out. She's weird about seeking medical help. She's been ok (well, for a WAS...LOL) since then. No more physical problems I mean.

I wanted to check in here - this is THE worst time of the semester.....the end.... SOOOOOOO much to do. I missed the MB and lurk sometimes to keep up with my friends' sitches, but I pop in and out really fast. This week is CRUNCH week, and after that, smooth sailing for a few. Until it starts again in January (I love it)

Same old stuff here. I got the mail today and noticed W got a mailer as a 'preferred customer' from a jewelry store....I'm guessing she's gotten OW a nice christmas gift, while complaining to ME that she has no money!! Why things like that hurt, i don't know, but they do.

Saw L today. Will update in more detail when I get time -- but basically she had to refer me due to conflict. She actually knows W in a business-relationship. But she did tell me she thinks i definitely have more parental legal rights than I thought, and that she is concerned about MIL's role --- being pushy and triangulting with S. I need to be more assertive with her. I haven't because I was so afraid about losing S, so i've been a doormat in many ways. L said to call the other L tomorrow, she thinks we may need to file some paperwork NOW to protect me with S and house.

Will let you guys know what I find out. I feel better knowing I probably do have some custodial rights, but scared sh!tless b/c MIL could do some asserting since W leaves S there so often. It's a big old mess!!!!! But at least I'm being proactive finally.

Don't remember if I posted here that last week I went to lender and found out that I qualify to buy the house I'm in (if W will sell to me) or buy another one. That was a relief for sure. Great credit and low debt to income ratio.

Thinking of you guys!!!!