ME: "I read an interesting post earlier by someone, somewhere about how sometimes a WAS with emotional issues will wind up with a similar OP who they think "get's them" and mistakes the emotionally stable LBS as out of touch. I recognize possible patterns in my XW. So can someone link me to that please? Want to read it again."
Me 53 XW 50 M 18 Years +2 S14 D19 Bomb 10-24-10 Served 1-27-11 Mediate 4-21-11 Civil D Final 6-2-11 No church anullment "A man is not finished when he is defeated, he is finished when he quits."
Forgiveness is letting bygones be bygones and no longer holding something against someone.
Insanity is making yourself vulnerable to another person's crazyness all over again.
I like it!
Okay I give up. A lot of screen names are easy ehough to figure out. But what does "sgctxok" mean?
Me 53 XW 50 M 18 Years +2 S14 D19 Bomb 10-24-10 Served 1-27-11 Mediate 4-21-11 Civil D Final 6-2-11 No church anullment "A man is not finished when he is defeated, he is finished when he quits."
I'm sure many of you have varying ideas: social life, hobbies and private life, anything to fight the seratonin imbalance brought on the "bomb", anything to take one's mind off the "sitch".
Allow me to offer just one perspective.
I was in the chapel the yesterday questioning and listening. GAL activities felt somewhat artificial to me, "fake it till you make it" kind of stuff, and now that I am already D and for the most part off the emotional coaster (detached), I just prayed and wondered where to go from here.
You see because I recall Aloneat35's post linked above. One spouse's boring is another spouse's contentment (that's me). One spouse's lack of emotional fire and intensity is another spouse's emotional maturity and stability (that's me).
So for me, GALing is not "necessarily" doing specific things, it is in the end "radiating." Radiating your life, (your GAL) of happiness and contentment and peace.
You radiate from inside out, not from outside out. Essentially, you live (or GAL) from the inside.
Peace, Pic.
Me 53 XW 50 M 18 Years +2 S14 D19 Bomb 10-24-10 Served 1-27-11 Mediate 4-21-11 Civil D Final 6-2-11 No church anullment "A man is not finished when he is defeated, he is finished when he quits."
Well said, IaP. I think the definition of GAL'ing is different for everybody. For me, I just happen to be an energetic person and I thrive from doing a lot of different things. It's not just simply keeping busy for me, it adds that extra spring to my step. I think that "radiating" is generated by doing whatever leads toward being your best possible self.
I believe GAL IS different for each and everyone. The common thread is doing something for you, that lessens or allows you to forget for a time the situation you are in.
I do like the GAL's that improve a person.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
Well said, IaP. I think the definition of GAL'ing is different for everybody. For me, I just happen to be an energetic person and I thrive from doing a lot of different things. It's not just simply keeping busy for me, it adds that extra spring to my step. I think that "radiating" is generated by doing whatever leads toward being your best possible self.
Excellent! By George, you've got it.
Me 53 XW 50 M 18 Years +2 S14 D19 Bomb 10-24-10 Served 1-27-11 Mediate 4-21-11 Civil D Final 6-2-11 No church anullment "A man is not finished when he is defeated, he is finished when he quits."
Wow, havn't been back here in a month. Football season will do that to me. Still in co-habitation limbo. I'll post an update later. Pic.
Me 53 XW 50 M 18 Years +2 S14 D19 Bomb 10-24-10 Served 1-27-11 Mediate 4-21-11 Civil D Final 6-2-11 No church anullment "A man is not finished when he is defeated, he is finished when he quits."