Oh my Tal...call it coincidense or intuition...whatever, there is a GREAT irony that I just HAPPENED to read your thread today.
I don't talk about this too often...normally not until I'm compelled to in some way but there is an open acceptance here so maybe folks won't think I'm a total loon after all Maybe it is meant for me to talk about it as well considering how much it has been in the front of my mind lately.
I too have certain "gifts". I have always had them although it seems that as I have gotten older some of them have decreased in strength while others have increased. Oddly enough I have never been ridiculed for them although some people have been totally freaked out when they have manifested...they expect some kind of parlor trick I guess when the reality is something altogether different.
I also strongly believe that these gifts come from my Native American heritage. My maternal great grandfather was a medicine man and the family has always talked openly about his abilities to heal and commune with the spirit world. Oddly, the gifts he may have passed on have never manifested itself in another male in the family but many of the women in my family possess them to some degree. Some see auras, many have "dreams", some just pick up the phone before it rings. From our various conversations about the subject though none seem to have them to the degree I do.
Personally, I wish I had only one...I was even relieved to an extent when it seemed as if my illness might have made them all go away. It seems as though I just suffered from "overload" though and it took a while for me to recover from it.
It was my gifts that clued me in to H's A. You would have thought that they would have prevented him from attempting such a hurtful thing...I guess he thought they were gone for good though and saw safety in that. Yes, my H is fully aware of certain aspects of my gifts and has asked me to use them on occasion. It's the times when he hasn't asked me to use them that he isn't so appreciative of. Of course there are those that I have no control over either. I do think that they did help H tip more to my side when he was on the fence about getting a D or not. I told him that I had "looked" and I told him what I had "seen" and I let him draw his own conclusion.
Hmmm...this still isn't so easy to talk about. I'm being cryptic aren't I ?
These are my gifts. My strongest is empathy. I am not speaking about the normal form of empathy though...not the type where you can say "I've experienced a similar thing and I know how you feel". I actually FEEL other people's emotions, physical ailments etc. This empathic bond is strongest between H and I and with certain members of my family. It goes beyond feeling to actually "seeing" through their eyes. Can you imagine how that felt when H was having his A? I wouldn't wish that on anyone.
I have precognitive dreams as well and can do some active predicting but it takes a great deal of effort. I can commune with the dead and can sense/see spirits but this isn't as strong as it was when I was younger. I've never minded talking to family members and such after they have passed but I also seem to attract some pretty malevolent beings...even thinking about some of those makes my skin crawl. I think my empathy leaves me open to experiencing a beings death as well or allows for them to "show" me what it was like. I don't like this at all but I have learned from it not to fear my own death.
My gifts have shown me that none of us are set on a certain path...we have many paths to choose from. A given prediction can be changed if the actions leading up to that prediction's outcome are changed. A prediction comes true if the course toward it is never deviated from. I can tell you Tal that your future holds/held a little boy in it...I'm leaning toward a child of your own rather then a grandchild (just the way it feels) BUT there are other possiblities there as well...if you choose to go another way (continued contraception, Wolfie gets a vasectomy (?)) then the child disappears. Ok, I don't know WHY I just said that but I think you get the gist of what I mean.
I'm going to post the horrible dream I had this weekend on my thread. Anyone with dream interpretive skills I hope can help me figure out HOW to change this one's course (yeah...it had THAT kind of feel to it) .
Sorry for rattling on Tal
Zoo
"If patience is worth anything, it must endure to the end of time. And a living faith will last in the midst of the blackest storm."
- Mahatma Gandhi
Yes, Zoo...I completely understand. When you speak of these things, there is no ego in it. I honestly believe that if you go back far enough in any heritage, there is a background of such things. It has only been less time for natives. Sadly, because so much of it is part of our spiritual practices (religions, you could say) things are carefully guarded. Did you know that until 1978, with the passage of the Indian Freedom of Religion Act, it was illegal for us to practice our own traditional spiritual practices? Just attending ceremonies could cause you to be jailed placed in a mental institution?
There is another aspect of this whole thing that I haven't talked about. In our way, it is often that people get very jealous of people who have certain gifts. There are those who practice ways that are--for lack of any better word--evil. Some of them know the old ways well enough to send harmful things in your direction. It's called "throwing bad medicine". I have had people I didn't even know come up and tell me that someone tried to do that to me, but was unable to harm me directly, so they threw it into my family--as a way to hurt me. I have had a sense of that for some time know, and I believe what was said. In a way, the crisis that my family has gone through surely felt like a spiritual battle.
You probably haven't read any of my early threads. I knew my mate was having an A because I had a series of dreams over 2 week's time. Wolfie's ancestor (who he inherited his Indian name from) came to me and took me down a path to a river. Wolfie was standing on the banks of the river with his back to us. The old man would point to Wolfie and had a very dissapproving look on his face. Each dream gave a little more detail. One night the old man showed me Wolfie on the bank, talking to a woman--she also had her back to us.
At that point, I told Wolfie that I was dreaming of his g-g-grand trying to show me something that Wolfie was hiding from me. I asked him what was going on and if there was something he should tell me. Wolfie said "no" and covered very well, but I saw fear pass through his eyes for a fraction of a second. The dream that night told me the rest of the story. I woke up, woke Wolfie up, and asked, "are you having an A?". He tells me no, and kindof snorts in disgust that I would even ask. I tell him that makes me confused because his g-g-grandfather showed me that he was and busted him. Wolfie again says no.
Then I went looking, and knew everything I needed to know within hours. If Wolfie ever had any doubts about me "knowing things", he doesn't anymore. To be honest with you, I knew what the end result would be. I never doubted that he would want to come home. I just worried that by the time he got around to figuring it all out, I would have lost all patience and ended things myself.
I don't know why I started this subject in the first place, really. Except for maybe those dreams started close to this time last year.
The most recent dream I had that felt "like that" was dreaming a few nights ago that I was watching and overhearing a conversation between Wolfie and XOW. I think that the conversation actually happened and what I heard was really said. It wasn't anything too worrisome, though.
Anyway, it sounds like there are alot of people in this group with a lot of power. Could be some interesting happenings if we all got together, although I do believe that some of the things we are speaking of travel easily through anything electric/electronic.
And off onto a COMPLETELY different topic. I wanted to post on CHL's thread, but it is locked. First of all, I didn't much care for being lumped in as a bunch of "angry, bitter women". That is like if I object to blatant sexual harrassment so I am called a feminazi. Frankly, I don't think it is even a gender issue. If Ceb guy has issues about women--that's for him to deal with--not my problem.
Secondly, sometimes the most helpful and supportive thing you can do for anyone is to call BS on BS. I have been pretty hard on a few people here who got caught up in rationalization and denial. I certainly would expect a room full of 2x4's if you guys see me going into that mode!
I do understand that morals also aren't a "one-size-fits-all" thing, but to me, rationalizations and justifications are for when people KNOW they are doing something wrong and are trying convice self-and others that they are not.
I would have liked to have had the opportunity to have had a discussion about "fuzzy morals". I do not understand the concept of "not-really-committing adultry-because I wasn't married in my head at the time".
So does that mean that if I go cheat on my mate tonight, but tell him he has no right to react because I was temporarily "divorced from him in my mind at the time"? That kind of thinking is along the same lines as Bill Clinton denying that he had sex with Monica Lewinsky because in his mind he had rationized that oral sex wasn't really sex.
So oral sex isn't sex and adultry isn't adultry if you are "divorced in your mind at the time".
We did happen to be talking about infidelity at the time, and infidelity is a big issue. Heck, it even shows up in the bible as one of the 10 basic rules, right? And let's not forget that in some cultures, if anyone of us women were suspected of cheating, our husbands could have us subject to female castration or evan an honor killing.
When it comes to rationalizations, though---it could be about any subject really. You can even take any other form of justification and twist it around to suit your needs at any given time. At what point does an adult stand up and have integrity, though?
I'm not saying that we all have to have the same values, but I do have to wonder about the philosphy that nothing is ever right and wrong--it's only about "where your head is at-at the time" or "I was finding myself and it felt good at the time". Ya know, I don't care if folks are whatever color, whatever religion, straight, gay, dem or republican...if you don't have integrity--what do you really have?
Just had to vent a little and couldn't do it on CHL's thread. Actually, from what I'm seeing there lately--I probably should keep out of there. I like CHL, but don't like some of the things he's doing. I said what I thought, straight up and without being malicious, and he can take or leave it.
I'm afraid I'm the culprit that Cel intended to strike out at for wielding my indignant saber at David's knees. I lack the polish and finesse of my fellow/sister posters at times and speak what's on my mind without self censoring and I am guilty of having done that on CHL's thread. I don't apologize for what I said however, nor how I said it, because I am numb to the pretentious feelings of WAs that cloak themselves in victimization while they strip away the very core of the person that trusts them most.
But, I am grateful that there are people like you Tal, that make the same point, but do so with far less vileness than I.
T2
Well said Tal...
back to the comments earlier. I dont have any ties to Native americans, my ties are British and French, But I have dreams on ocassion. I dont remember them right away but when I get into the situation that the dream was, its like deja vue and I remember everything about the dream.
When My Grandfather died he came to me in a dream, So did my mother when she died.
But right now I have those deja vue moments about dealing with WAW. We are on our third bomb drop and now are separated. But I can remember vividly in my dreams about everything I am dealing with now. I can even remember that she finally does come back to me for good. But I am likeyou were. Trying to do the right things to make her want to come back and to not give up on her before she does.
My Yahoo id is kevmic28
Honesty, sincerity, tenderness and trust. A little less time for the rest of the world, And more for the two of us. Kisses each mornin, I love yous at night, Just like it used to be.
Quote: I like CHL, but don't like some of the things he's doing. I said what I thought, straight up and without being malicious, and he can take or leave it.
Yea, me too.
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
I also turned to my own thread yesterday to post my thoughts on what had happened on CHL's thread, after finding it locked. But guess what. Mine was locked up too! Guess JJ did a sweep.
I was surprised that Ceb made reference to your post as one of the heavy-handed. I thought that you were both helpful and tactful.
My take on what Ceb and Cal were saying in reference to the "fuzzy morals" issue is that, 'right or wrong', it's where CHL's head may be at, at this time - in that 'alien mode' we all know and love.
I think that Ceb and Cal were trying to give us a peek into the kind of convoluted thinking that WAS's manage as they wreck havok.
I'm wrestling with some feelings regarding Ceb's opening remarks to "the ladies" as well, (that naming and chastising thing). But I'm trying to practice restraint and DB the situation.
I have a whole lot of choice words for my H for his past behavior - HIS CHEATING - and as much as I know that what he did was wrong, wrong, WRONG, I don't let loose my rath only because it would be anti-productive.
I know none of us want to push CHL away, and we all want to help Pam. So...
Quote: I have a whole lot of choice words for my H for his past behavior - HIS CHEATING - and as much as I know that what he did was wrong, wrong, WRONG, I don't let loose my rath only because it would be anti-productive.
I totally agree, Jeannine! Liked your Post here! Glad I wasn't around here when things started flying LOL. I would of rather been here than where I was; in court. At least I didn't have to pay treble damages. Some men are just buttholes!