Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums For Newcomers Feels Like I'm In Two-a-Days

Do better.

We ALL backslide. All of us.

Next time you'll be more cautious. Right?

Exactly.

Not to be used as an excuse.

But to be expected really.

Don't sulk about it, learn from it.

Best lesson I ever taught myself was to own up to my mistakes and move on. It's a shame it took 40+ years to learn it

If I can do it, you can too.

Last night was really rough for me. Lots of emotions were running through me...all the "what ifs." I have to be out of the house next Friday. I'm not sure where to go. My apt won't be ready until mid Sept. She'd told me before she left I could stay. When she called about OM on Friday she said she wanted me gone when she got back. I asked for clarification and she said gone. I asked until the 6th so I'd have Saturday to get out and she no.

Didn't hear from her today. She runs tomorrow. I want to shoot her a quick "I hope you do well" but I know that is probably not a good idea (maybe Starsky yelling at me will drive it home...LOL).

I've got to find ways to stop trying to make sense of it. I'm such analytically geared person. I like answers. I like things to fit together and I know this doesn't. Not sure what to do.

You know, she can't *make* you leave if your name is on the lease/deed.

Just a thought .. why are you letting her be in control?

I'm not letting her and my name isn't on there. She bought the house before we were married. Never imagined this scenario so I didn't think twice about it. It's court ordered that I have to be gone so yes, she can make me. Wish it were something I can control but I cannot.

Come on Starsky, where's the yelling?

The thing is mgm, you are one here that you get the concept.

You KNOW what you need to do.

So you come in offering your own 2x4's.

That is good!

Look, this isn't meant to sound like an ass, but...

If this helps you...

Your W is saying GET OUT!

And you want to say "OK, hope you do well"

How does this sound to you?

This has nothing to do with going the other direction and being a d!ck.

It's just being strong.

Respecting her decision for NOW.

And taking care of yourself.

At some point soon, you two will be seeing each other face-to-face again.

What kind of man are you going to show her?

Strong and confident?

Or scared and weak?

Use this time you have wisely. This is where you build the strength.

Wish you well.

You're absolutely right. I do know the right thing to do and contacting her is not that.

She messages me at 3am this morning:

W: I just want you to know that I dont blame you for where we are. A lot of it is my fault and I realize that.

The anger in me wants to say "you think?" but I do also recognize that what she's saying isn't 100% true. I know where I "fell short" at times. I have yet to respond and I'm not sure how to really respond to that...if at all.

hunh???