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I had noticed that after she told me that she wishes she could find someone like my H, she started sitting outside with him more and going with him on calls when I was in class. It was at this time that I had mentioned to him that it seemed like he was spending more time with her than he was me. I believe that caused a fight that day.

At some point after she first decided to confront me with my H being done with me. I was going through his phone looking for a number for a call we were on and had noticed a contact name of "B" in his phone. I clicked it and realized that it was the roommate's cell number. It was about that time the customer walked up to sign the invoice. I was upset but finished with the customer and went to see if there were any txts between them. Sure enough there was about meeting him after a call and riding with him. I was mad and shaking and than I was caught when my H went to get in the truck.

He looked at me and says well...you took that better than I thought. It was a test because you go through my phone so I had her send a message to it.I didn't really say anything. I had tears rolling down my face. I really didn't believe him either.

He would get so upset when I told him I trust you but I don't trust her. He would say than you don't have trust in me.

Today was an interesting day... someone must be up there listening to my prayers. I did good haven't txted H in about a week. I got a text from him wanting me to resend the txts from last week to him.

Then H was fishing for info, talking about are you dating yet pimpstress? I said no but there is this one guy I'm interested in that works too much and gave a description of him.

He mentioned how he seen me with the BIL alot. I ended up meeting up with him, haven't seen him in three months and gave him some mail I had. I kept the convo positive and neutral. He was wearing his ring even though it was on the right hand instead. I smiled and mentioned it and he said he has been wearing it.

It was a pretty good visit and I know he is confused about my 180s that I have done I seen it on his face. I brought up something a friend said and then said I didn't agree with it and just dropped it which surprised him.

I mentioned that I'm pretty sure dad would let him move back in to cut down on some bills. This was my way of saying he needed to move out of the house AWAY from the roommate.

Being in the van with him I was reminded of the toxic roommate because I happened to look down and noticed her glasses case and bottle of makeup remover stashed under the passenger seat. I didn't say anything about it and didn't react at all.

He mentioned that I flipped out about the van and I didn't know anything about it. I was calm and said I didn't flip out and I was upset because of who helped him get it. H says it didn't matter who helped him get it that it was paid for and he has title and is making payments. I just kind of dropped it and changed the subject which surprised him again.

I am usually very stubborn and will keep going till I proove my point but I just let it go. I asked him why he took my name off the business and he said he did it to cover his behind and he still doesn't realize that even though, he put her name on it that it is still a marital asset because it was started during the marriage. I just said that it hurt my feelings when he took my name off because we started it together and left it at that.

The whole time we were talking he had his hand on me and was looking into my eyes. He kissed me on the forehead a couple of times and we actually kissed and I still get the butterflies in my stomach like the first time we kissed.

He talked about how he is with the road clubs he was trying to get with awhile ago. I smiled and told him I was proud of him for that. Well, I'll let this all sink in for him and hope for the best. I always said that everything we have been through has only made us stronger as a couple.

I didn't tell him I love him I refrained from doing that this time but I have to work on leaving before he does. I thanked him for seeing me. Hopefully my patience and my new changes bring him closer and the roommate can finally release her claws from my H.

He is still on the defensive and is not sure about wanting to start over. He acted like I didn't know what I was talking about when I brought the last time I talked to him and the convo went that it was over, why wasn't I getting it, weren't the papers enough? He just said someone else had the phone, which it was more than likely the Roommate. I let that convo go too. I'm just going to keep praying that we make it through this and keep to my 180s.

Ok, so I am really confused right now... that alien that took my H and gave me this crappy one needs to come back and do another exchange. This one is giving me a migraine.

My aunt passed away today at 3 this afternoon and my BIL and MIL both tried to contact the H. The BIL didn't get a response from him at all. MIL called him and he had nothin to sat at all about my aunt. To MIL it also seemed like it was not a big deal to him at all. Apparently his life of work and living with the roommate that there is something going on with is more important than me.

Right now, all I really want is my H to comfort me and be there for me. He won't even talk to me on the phone but he will text. The only time he does that is when he is not with the roommate (homewrecker). In the mean time I have been crying on and off since I found out.

I'm not going to say anything to him till he talks to me. I know I should be mad at him but I'm not because I know he can't see through the fog right now. Its a really thick fog, one of those that you can't the the tail lights that are two feet infront of you.

^

Well, I had my first IC session today. What I got out of it? C said I am a strong person for everything I have been through, roommate needs serious help, and H is somewhat taking responsibility for things that happened while still trying to place blame on me.

I don't know what to do...I was looking on my BIl's FB and my H's profile pic on there is a pic of him and the roommate from earlier in the month of may. I try not to let it get to me but it's hard because it makes me feel like there is no hope of me and him getting back together. I know I had a pretty good vibe about the last meeting I had with him. Next IC appt is at the end of the month and we are going to work on depression and stress management issues.

I haven't heard from my H in over a week and I'm breaking down here with the whole no contact thing. I have friends that have known H for along time and they say they don't know him anymore. They also think that me going to counseling without H or the homewrecking roommate there that the counselor won't be able to give me accurate advice.

My friend also is afraid that the counselor will give me false hope in my M. But, everytime I have follow this friend's advice it backfires. I feel so torn, I hate this, I am just going to have gather the strength back and go back to him initiating contact with me. I just think it is messed up how my friends think that I would be waiting for along time and they don't want me to wait forever for my H.

I think I need to read DR again because I think it is funny how everytime I read it my H starts coming around again. I think I might have messed up when I seen him that last time. He was trying to tell me something and I kissed him and didn't let him finish what he was saying when I should have. For that I think I backslid.

I had a half way decent weekend hadn't heard from the H in three weeks. Started hanging out with H's step brother and hadn't seen him in 9 years. H's step brother added H and Roommate as friends on FB and seen roommate talking trash about me on there with the knowledge I can't see it because she deleted me as a friend and blocked me months ago.

She mentioned I was pathetic, they are happy together and love each other very much. The best revenge is that there is nothing I can do about it. They are going to show me very soon.
Step brother confronted her on FB and told her it was stupid to be talking trash about me when I can't see it. SB also went on to say that he bet she had been ran through more times than the NYC marathon and stealing a roommate's husband is trashy. He also went on to say that H needed to get his nuts out of her purse and went on.

Yesterday, I get 3 missed calls from H while at work. I have 3 or 4 texts from him. He wanted me to meet up with him to talk. I met up with him after work and he talks to me for a minute. H asks if I have been hanging out with SB and I say yep. H then says he is done with the drama and I say so am I. He says he has been tired of the drama to which I say so am I. He says we tried to talk and make it work but can't. He didn't even make an attempt. Process server came up while me and H were talking and handed me the papers. I ask H if he is in a relationship with roommate he says "I am now.." He then says "go find someone else to love."

H only has verbalized he wanted to fix it but didn't go any further than that months ago. H was still living in the house with roommate this entire time and doesn't have any intentions of leaving the house.

I went to mom in law's house crying and she tries to comfort me. She then tells me that she found out Roommate posted on FB that is a month pregnant and only important people know about the baby and that is H's dad and her parents.

I have 20 days to respond to summons. H put that there are no assets and marriage is irretrievably broken. I prayed,Galed, let him innitiate contact. H was looking really rough when I seen him yesterday. I am pretty sure roommate's intentions are to marry him because she is pregnant and she gets what she wants because all her friends are either married or have kids and she was depressed about not having that.

I'm not sure if she is really pregnant or not because she feeds off of attention she receives. MIL says to tell everyone not to say anything to her on Fb and ignore her and everything will die down. H has his mind made up he wants D because its what she wants more than him.

BIL is very upset about all of this, H told me that he was going to put a restraining order on SB and if his B came back over the house with an attitude he would put one on him too. BIL is 17,I asked H you would really put a restraining order on your own brother and he said if he keeps up the attitude he will. I just shook my head, H is mad because I am talking to SB again.

At this point, I'm going to get ready for the D and I guess go through with it since I don't have any other choices. Roommate is going to get even more hostile during this process.If me and H even tried to reconcile she would have more hostility towards me than what she already does. Thanks for what advice people did give me I greatly appreciate it. I have been crying for the past three days and I don't think there is anything else I can do.

I had IC on monday, it went ok I guess. I thought about something that made me laugh the other day. I thought about sending roommate that took my H a thank you card. In it have "thank you for taking the responibility of taking care of him off my hands." Don't think I could actually do that though, it was funny to think about and I know she would probably get mad and call her mom and pitch a fit like she does about everything else.

There is still some part of me that hopes that me and H will get back together. I have wanted to contact H but haven't done it because I know it would be pursuing.

I want to tell him that his SB only started stuff with the roommate and him about me to get back at him. SB doesn't like him or get along with my H.

I really would like to chew roommate out and maybe even hit her a couple of times but I don't want to go to jail and she is not worth it. I feel like a part of me is missing, I spent 8 yrs with this man. I don't regret marrying him, I just wish I never met this girl who only pretended to be my friend and be my roommate to get my H. I hate manipulative people think they can get what they want and get away with it.

Well, I had an interesting weekend. Left friday night and went to PCB. Brought back memories of taking trips by myself before me and H ever got together. I still feeling like I'm missing a limb without him.

Met up with a friend and her boyfriend that moved there. I had fun, sat by the pool got a tan took some pictures. I had quite a bit of fun and laughs. The friends were a couple that the evil roommate tried to mess things up for before she stuck her nose in me and H's R.

They want to kidnap H and get him right and drop her off somewhere no on would ever find her again. After what all I learned of evil roommate now I feel bad for H more than I did before. It felt good to escape and go to the beach and be with friends. Was busy all day sunday, drove back in the am to make it back in time for church. Let the dog out and went to take a shower, eat late lunch with friends, and first tournament for Apa pool league.

I didn't do too good still learning all the rules, but had fun weekend full of GAL. I had counseling today, had to write a letter to roommate and not hold back end up 4 pages front and back about what I thought of her. It felt pretty good, probably could have thought of a few more adjectives for home wrecker. Counselor agreed with everything that I said about roommate.

Counselor was also amazed to learn that roommate has tried to ruin another couples relationship. Not sure what to think about H. I love him to death and hope he comes to his senses before its too late. I have been out of the house since february and its now July and I'm served with papers. H is still in the house with roommate how much longer is this going to last?

Well, got news today that the roommate is pregnant she finally went to the doctor. So I think I might as well throw in the towel for my M. I can't compete with that....she just really proved she is a homewrecker. I really don't want to give up but I feel like I am being forced out of my M. Just like I was forced out of the house...I was in a good mood until I heard that... any words of encouragement?